The word "fat" took me during my college years when I really met girls with eating disorders. Girls who spend hours in the bathroom, with sores in the intestines. Girls hiding food under her bed. In my mind, so many messages about obesity, I had accumulated so much story that I could not prevent all of them from falling down on me, I could not breathe for a long time, I have to say.
I have always felt very strong emotions against people's weaknesses and I especially hated the word fat. But I didn't think my little girl using it like that would hit me like a slap in my face.
On the other hand, I was thinking about it. A light chubby 7-year-old girl, followed by a life that goes on and on with life. Mirrors in front of you, diets, diet pills, that you hate yourself. They all came to me. Even after eating a full cake with friends, I even tried to vomit myself.
My doctor once told me he was big-faced. Now he says I have small bones, doctors. It's weird because I don't think bones have changed, I think that what people saw when they looked at me changed, their perceptions changed.
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