Was trying to listen to some of the old music I made, right, it didn't seem quite right, yet I really do like it! Know not to be quiet about it, I can sample it. Have an ample fit!! Not enough to get knotted up and over-bored then thrown overboard. Just enough to stay absorbed, not too much obsessed. The right kinda freak out I like! So this author dude ditches me on the f.b. platform after I used the 'take a sad song and make it better' joke as a response to his post on some romantic literature, be Judish - stay on the sunny side of morbid!! I said And he left, gone, just when I was about to say something. Now I go back listen to all the music, see all the movies and just everything!! ack! I gotta do it myself, let go of it, keep the influence, create a satire for this moment that doesn't make fun of anyone. Hah it just might be an experiment, the stuff will write itself, wether it is releasable or not is another take, kind like the old musics I maked.
So now I gotta let go of the pop culture for awhile while still planning to go to some next concerts in November. I must process not just the summer concert experience but myself 'cause the musics brought me back to myself. Now time for me to give back. That's what I will do. Create what I feel, write something, something that I may never release. Be able to create without any pressure. That will be best. Out of it I know there will be something I could release to the public. I'm getting the air to create for my own! At least at first. Some kinda personal therapy I do for me! Hmm, yes this is a good feeling, I want to forget all the social psychology, my own habits and even thoughts and let something loose out! I can feel that, I can get into that zone with no worry.
I feel the tensions in the pop culture it seems. Gotta get back to my original take and forget about it. I know it's about a social hunger, a lost sense of security, a world that seems on the brink. Yet a more playful way is on the roll. There will be no name calling, shaming or public humiliation. Cartoon detox time is what I'm saying. More of a sense of history and ancestry. Anyway tired, trailing off. I think tomorrow should be a fun day!!
