Dear Non-Readers,
I hope this letter finds you well. Or, at the very least, finds you in a state of mild curiosity about the wonders you're missing out on.
Let me tell you, my friends, you're not living your best life. In fact, I'd venture to say that your life is a dull, gray existence devoid of the vibrancy and excitement that only my writing can provide.
Think about it: without my stories, you're missing out on thrilling adventures, poignant moments of introspection, and heartfelt explorations of the human condition. Your imagination is a barren wasteland, devoid of the lush landscapes, memorable characters, and pulse-pounding plot twists that I so skillfully craft.
But it's not just about the entertainment value (although, let's be real, my writing is ENTERTAINING). It's about the personal growth, the broadened perspectives, and the newfound empathy that comes from immersing yourself in the worlds and characters I create.
So, I implore you: don't waste another moment living in a world without my writing. Join the ranks of the enlightened few who have discovered the joys of immersing themselves in my stories.
Trust me, your life will be better for it.
Yours sincerely (and with a healthy dose of literary superiority),
Eroded Thoughts