In Belgium, the theme of gender neutrality is omnipresent. This has mainly to do with the well-known journalist Boudewijn Van Spilbeeck. He wanted to be a girl since he was 8 years old. The feeling that something was wrong, despite his domestic happiness, continued to live and the "gender dysphoria" became stronger. At the age of 58, the journalist announced that, from now on, he will go through life as a woman. Boudewijn became Bo. Gender neutrality and gender differences dominate the social debate. Not a day goes by without a news item that questions classical gender relations. The Dutch Railways are abandoning the announcement "ladies and gentlemen", and by the end of 2017 #Metoo was something that every man should be ashamed of.
What about men and women who choose to continue living as a born man or woman? You see, I'm a man and I’m enjoying it.
Don’t get me wrong. That relationships between people and groups of people are questioned is perfectly normal and should even be encouraged. No healthy thinking person wants to go back to the time when women did not have rights or gay people did not have equal family rights. Anyone who feels locked up in the wrong body has the right to feel like this and to come out publicly whenever he, she or X wants it. Our society is clearly ready for major changes in the field of gender relations.
Boudewijn Van Spilbeeck, before and after
Never before have we all been so progressive in acknowlegde people who are different. Apart from a few hotheads and conservative groups, everyone accepts gay marriage (in Belgium). Gender reassignment became also a lot easier recently.
Although I welcome these changes, I wonder which social role I will play as a man in the future.
Which role a man has to play?
At a fast pace, the two basic sexes ‘man’ and ‘woman’ are confronted with new standards that will have his influence on our behavior. Just as the emancipation of women has caused major social changes, the transgender revolution will also create new social relations.
In order to avoid gender conflicts in the future, it is therefore necessary to think carefully about the measures that are being taken with regard to the integration of all these different sexes. Taking into account the feelings of transgender people and gender neutrality also implies that cisgenders should be taken into account.
These are men and women who choose to continue to live as a born man or woman. In that respect, it does not seem appropriate to completely abolish "ladies and gentlemen". Nor do I think it would be a good idea to replace male or female words with gender-neutral pronouns as is the case in Sweden.
I’m a man and I feel okay with that. So I think it is also nice to be addressed with sir. Women also make that reasoning.
Catherine Deneuve, after the fuss about Harvey Weinstein, placed heavy emphasis upon the right to still be able to feel like a woman. Gender neutrality where every expression of a gender is undesirable, is reminiscent of gender communism and cannot possibly be the solution in an open and healthy society.
Abolishing sexes or shun them (as some suggest) goes against the liberal principle of being able to be who you want.
Let us add sexes instead of losing men and women.
Let us avoid situations where people are no longer free to feel male or female and have to go through life as sexless zombies.
Let us deal with new social challenges in a liberal way and, above all, not lapse in situations where everyone should be the same. Only then social integration will be a fact for every individual.