I told you last time that in terms of preparing food, becoming vegan wasn't that hard for me since I could cook quite well.
The vastly bigger challenge was to implement my choices into everyday life.
At that time I attended university and lived in a shared apartment during the week. I did my own shopping and was therefore able to buy and cook only plant-based products.
However on the weekends when I came home my mother did the cooking. We had a lot of vegetables, grains, etc. and it wasn't hard for her at all to not cook any meat after I showed her some of the facts I had researched. She was well aware of the risks and the damage to the environment and only buying organic stuff thus far, leaving out meat was just her next step.
It was great for me to have found such a supportive and understanding person in my mum. That really helped me out a lot and I imagine my journey would have been way more troublesome otherwise.
On the other hand she sometimes cooked something traditional using milk or a dairy product. At that time it wasn't a problem for me. I kinda used the 80/20 rule: thinking that it's not that bad for my body if I eat healthy about 80% of the time and only 20% "unhealthy" meaning animal products or sweets, etc. Additionally we bought all the stuff from our local organic grocery store so I knew that the products are local hence I assumed that they were not that bad for the environment and the animals are raised on lovely farms, enjoying a good life. I told myself that and also believed it in order to justify my moral standpoint.
I simply was too lazy to always cook for myself when my mother was in the kitchen a second ago, creating a delicious meal that fulfilled my demands to about 90%. So I squinted my eyes and indulged in her 80% vegan, 100% organic, 100% fresh cooked and 100% delicate meals.
You can probably guess where that story ends. I am always looking for optimization and my mum has an open mind. A few months after she told me "I can't imagine being vegan" (btw those are the first words I always hear when someone learns that I am vegan) she became vegan herself.
I am really grateful for that because it really simplifies my live a lot!
However I can imagine that many new vegans have problems with others when changing there lifestyle.
I feel with you since I know that it can be a problematic topic to talk about with loved ones that are not that open for change.
The good thing is that we now live in a time where there exist specific books that help you deal with such situations. If you need help articulating your needs, fears, problems, etc. and don't really know how to do so, I can recommend you invest in some helpful literature.
"Beyond Beliefs: A Guide to Improving Relationships and Communication for Vegans, Vegetarians and Meat Eaters" by Dr. Melanie Joy is a book that can really help you out. It's great for new Vegans, also to give it to the people they have problems with. It might safe your relationship or furthermore help you improve it or future ones since she leads you on a respectful and compassionate path.
Let me know if you have/had similar thoughts after informing yourself and how you deal with others.
V
BJ
PS: Here is a great talk by Dr. Melanie Joy worth watching!
