I count on that is the component wherein we’re purported to lock eyes in a crowded location, after which the whole thing spherical us blurs and Sam Smith swells and it’s like we’re the most effective people inside the room. likely someplace stereotypical like Grand important or like, Westlake as it’s 10 days till Christmas and the entirety is aesthetically very tons on factor and the scene is almost set for an excessively dramatic reunion.
I suppose that is the element after I’m supposed to see your call come upon my cellphone and my heartbeat is meant to race. I’m presupposed to have a few kind of physical response that pronounces deep down, “appearance. you still skip over him. appearance. He nonetheless thinks approximately you. look. look. Why aren’t you searching?” I’m speculated to have an existential catastrophe; a complete breakdown in which I rip out all of my emotions and splay them everywhere to analyze every harmless element and every little notion due to the fact who is aware of WHAT this indicates?!
I expect this is the element wherein it’s intended to intend some component. Or in which I’m at least imagined to want it to.
I suppose this is the element wherein I’m alleged to forgive and forget. wherein I’m meant to say, “permit’s not awareness at the beyond, permit’s speak about the destiny. permit’s discover a destiny. Do you want a destiny? I constantly have. Why aren’t we talking about the future??” This is meant to be the factor wherein whilst she asks me if I’ve heard from you I don’t admit to blowing you off. wherein after they question me in which you’re at, proper away I realize the solution and that i’m no longer checking Instagram because I have no concept. where I say I nevertheless check up on you, in which I say I nonetheless fear approximately you, in which I say I never stopped, in which I say I never will.
I think this is the element in which I’m presupposed to care. in which I’m presupposed to bend. wherein I’m speculated to fold in on myself and melt and admit I despite the fact that pass over you and say such things as “I have to in no way neglect the sound of your voice or the manner your sheets odor.“ wherein I’m supposed to cave and supply in and admit from time to time I desire once I reached out there was a you at the surrender as opposed to an empty area. in which I’m intended to say I nevertheless provide a shit and i couldn’t give up you if I attempted and i despite the fact that consider you.
but the factor is, as a good deal I think that’s presupposed to be this element, it isn’t.
This isn’t the issue in which I say I nevertheless care about you.
this is the element in which I’m certainly, absolutely, absolutely 100% sure I don’t.