allowing your needs to remain unaddressed while you continuously cater to others is the path toward resentment and bitterness
Assertiveness is declaring your point of view and not feeling as if you need others’ approval or validation
Burdened with a low self-image, we mistakenly believe our time is worth less than others’ time. We wrongly assume our goals and interests are inferior to other people’s goals and interests. We perceive our value to the world as somehow less than the value offered by those around us
The good news is that saying no can actually improve your sense of self-worth. The more you do it, the more you’ll come to realize that your time, commitments, and aspirations are just as important as those of the requestor
When you waffle in response to a request, you inadvertently welcome increased pressure from the requestor
Being sincere with a direct “no” shows respect. It also prevents the request from hanging over your head like a dark, ominous cloud
Think about the requests you regularly receive, whether at home or at your workplace. If they’re weighing you down and taking up too much of your time, try to categorize the worst offenders. Then, decide to reject the entire category
A person who struggles with a low self-image assumes other people are more important than he or she. Consequently, this individual lacks the confidence to act in self-interest. And that makes it difficult for him or her to say no
Learning to say no in these “low risk” situations allows you to slowly build your confidence. You can cautiously graduate to steadily higher-risk scenarios as your confidence grows
negative reactions to your refusal to help have nothing to do with you. In this case, they reflect Jack’s unfair expectations
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