A father looked at his little daughter lying on her bed. This little princess just arrived from the hospital a few days ago. He is only 4 days old and he is still a very funny little baby. Suddenly the baby's eyelid is slowly open. His black eyeballs stared at the ceiling. An amazing sight for his father. ?Hello dear...? the father tried to attract the attention of his daughter, but the little eye kept pointing up, to the ceiling of the room. Then the father grabbed a toy and shook it so that it made a clinking sound like a little bell. The baby still did not look back at the clinking sound. He tried again from different directions, but the baby still did not respond to the sound.
The wife from afar looked at what her husband did and just smiled. Is our daughter deaf ?? asked her husband. "Hey, he's only 4 days old, he does not know how to respond to anything, including voice, but not necessarily he deaf," he said. replied his wife. But he does not seem to respond to sound at all ,? the father continued with anxious as he continued to try to catch the attention of his baby with a clinking voice and his call or a clap. The baby is still staring up. The father even moves his hand in front of the baby's eyes. Also no response. ? He also did not respond to my hand movements ,? said the husband again to his wife. "Quiet, baby is so when he was still a few days like this ,? she replied calmly as she lifted and cradled the baby and then moved to respond to her mother's touch. Well, now he responds after being touched. I think he's deaf, dear ...,? The husband is still worried. ? Please, wait a few days, later when the next control to the pediatrician, we ask to check if he is deaf or not ,? said his wife.
If he is really deaf, maybe this is my fault, because one of my grandparents is deaf.? The father still regretted the condition? his daughter.
How heavy this baby's life later if it's big. Once the father imagines the difficulties his daughter will face later. He will be isolated in his silence. He can not enjoy music with his friends. He even sounds strange, because he can not imitate the words spoken by people. How could he listen to the teacher at his school who explained the important lesson. Or how could he hear that a truck would hit him from behind? Or another dangerous sound? That's how the father is filled with a shadow that is not good about the life of his daughter someday. For several days he continued to search for books or writings that contained how to raise a deaf child. He can not concentrate in his work at the office. Her mind was full of how to deal with her shortcomings. He can not even enjoy his favorite movie on television. He is in a depressed situation, though he thinks he is in a situation where he is preparing himself for a bad future daughter.
Meanwhile his wife is just waiting for the doctor's examination in a few days. He does all the things he used to do before, eating, drinking, exercising, listening to music, watching TV and more. He did little to browse the site about "parenting" and got information that his daughter's symptoms were normal and too early to take any conclusions.
Finally came the time to visit pediatricians regularly. Through the phone, the wife had previously asked specifically for the doctor to check her daughter's ear, whether she was able to hear normally or not. After examined the doctor was normal daughter ear, alias can hear well.
According to Martin E. P. Seligman, Ph.D., who wrote a book entitled? Learned Optimism? father and mother in the story above represents 2 ways of looking at life. Dad is a pessimist and mother is an optimist. A pessimist thinks all bad things will happen for a long time and all bad ones are related to him or feel it's his fault. While optimists think otherwise, that regard all the bad as a challenge that is not worrisome. Each of these points of view produces serious repercussions. Many studies have shown pessimist to easily give up and easily experience depression. Being an optimist has a good achievement, at school, workplace or in sports. They are also healthier and longer than pessimists.
Martin also mentions it is not easy to know if you are a pessimist or optimist. It is not even easy to know if you live in the shadow of a pessimist. However, most people will react negatively to what pessimists say, for example when they speak or write.
Pessimistic behavior can be permanent, although pessimism can actually be eliminated. Pessimist can change to be optimistic by learning cognitive skills related to optimism as described in the book Learned Optimism? mentioned above. The book will help us to understand whether we have a tendency to pessimism or optimism. Based on studies on thousands of people, this book can help or the people closest to you to eliminate pessimism and at the same time eliminate the effects of pessimism, namely depression.