Getting Back to Church
Stick with me. I probably talk about the reasons you gave up on church.
Getting out of the routine of going to church happens. I myself am guilty of missing a service and struggling to get back the following week. I have had two excuses in my life to justify not attending. I classify them under “Judgment” and “Busy Lives.” I constantly hear other people having the same excuses; and if you were to ask yourself why you have not been at church, your answer might match one of these two.
Judgment
When I fell into the “Judgment” reasoning for not being at church on Sunday, it took a long time for me to get over it. I would see the type of people who were snobby and judgmental about my appearance or the music I listened to. Those people would be at church and act like angels; and then the second the door shut behind them they would smirk and continue with the gossip they heard on Saturday night. Why would I want to associate with those people? “I pray to God when I’m alone. I don’t need church to be a Christian,” I would say to myself.
The reason this category is so hard to get out of is because under this mind-set it is difficult to see that you actually do need church. The problem is that you want everyone else to change when the problem lies with you. By boycotting church because someone was looking at you the wrong way or you overheard a conversation they had that was not as Christian as you would have liked to have heard, you are being as judgmental as the person that pushed you away. Maybe they had a bad day. Maybe no one told them good morning and they were feeling put out, too. I hate to say it, but we have become a nation of if we don’t like it, we walk away. We must change this, and change starts with each one of us.
The way I conquered this excuse is by telling myself, “Church is for God and myself. No one else should take that away from me.” Telling myself this got me back in the church door. Once I was back in church for a few weeks, my eyes started to open. I saw those same judgmental people, but I also saw people full of joy and kindness.
A few weeks after taking notice of the kind people around me, it began to affect me. I started to be friendlier and talking to people before the service started. I then heard the pastor quote Scripture that changed everything. “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you” (Colossians 3:13). Try reaching out to those people that you have been telling yourself are judgmental and have a conversation with them. You may find out that you might have been wrong this whole time or looking at the situation from the wrong angle.
- Have you ever felt judged in church? How did you handle that feeling?
- Do you think it is possible you took someone’s actions and/or reaction to something too personally?
- Have you stopped to think about what that person was going through in his or her life?
- Do you think you have ever come off as snobby at church? Explain.
Busy Lives
There comes a time in everyone’s life where the responsibilities pile up. Stacks of laundry, dirty dishes, and yardwork on top of a 40-hour workweek can add up to a stressed-out person. Throughout the workweek it may be tough to socialize with friends and family, which is why we cherish our weekends so much. We use those two days to interact with others we care about or just to relax and rest our minds. You could see how it would be easy for a person to justify missing a week of church.
The problem is that one week leads to two and two to three. Next thing you know it has been a month since you’ve attended and you don’t know how it came to this. Getting out of church is easy; getting back can prove to be a bit more difficult.
Our world is very fast-paced. Everyone wants things now. Amazon has spoiled us. I can order something today and have it on my doorstep in two days. This is great and very convenient, but it has made us expect things fast and done right away.
Our lives are busy because we make them busy. You choose to attend that event in the evening. You choose to take that work call after hours. I’m not saying being lazy is acceptable, but I am saying you have the ability to slow down your life. I myself notice that on weeks I don’t have any afternoon plans or events to attend on the weekend, I am more excited to attend church. When the plans get heavy and Sunday is the only day I get to slow down and rest, I am more apt to tell myself that I will listen to the sermon on the Internet and sleep in or lounge around. As good as this sounds, one, I rarely end up listening to the sermon online and, two, church is more than just a sermon.
Church is something that should be exciting, something you look forward to attending. I’ve seen a lot of people get into a habit of attending church, instead of having a desire to attend. Worship should not be a habit. It is something we feel and grow from as Christians.
Church should get us through the day-to-day grind and refuel us at the end of the week for the upcoming week. It is a community that lifts up each other. A place for sinners to go and repent. We need the physical fix that attending church gives us just as much as the spiritual aspects offered in church.
Congregating in the lobby before the service and shaking hands, hugging, and asking people how they are makes us feel whole again. It lets us know that we are all doing this thing called life together, and it feels good to be around groups of people with the same beliefs as ours.
- Have you ever been too busy for church?
- Did your missing one Sunday lead to more absences?
- Do you feel like part of a community at your church? Why or why not?
- What can you do to play a bigger part in your church?
When I started writing this article I thought it was going to be a breeze. As I wrote, I realized that everyone is going to have a little different reason for why they missed a church service or services. But as I kept going with it, I saw the solution is always the same. Waiting for someone to take your hand and bring you back to church is most likely not going to work or last. The solution is in your own mind.
Remember, if you are busy and exhaust yourself to the point of not wanting to go to church on Sunday, only you can change that. Slow down and remember why you started going to church in the first place. Reflect on how you feel after leaving church and make changes in your life that make attending exciting again.
If the problem lies with hypocritical, judgmental people in your congregation, think of the old saying we heard when we were young–WWJD (What Would Jesus Do?). Reach out to those people and overcome them with kindness. If you still are not feeling the desire to attend, you might try attending another church; but don’t just quit growing and worshipping God. Possibly the church you have been attending is not a right fit for you. There is nothing wrong with that. There is a church out there that you will enjoy. Believe me, I’ve been in your shoes.