WHAT IS DRAMA?
It's anything but difficult to recognize the practices of dramatization: chatter, privileged insights, triangulating, retaliating, faulting, evading, turf wars, exploding… the rundown goes on. A working definition that causes us understand the idea is more troublesome.
This is what we've thought of: Drama is the thing that happens when individuals battle against themselves or each other, with or without mindfulness, to feel legitimized about their negative conduct. Dramatization is tied in with battling against. There's dependably a victor and a failure. The battle might be inside, between individuals, or including organizations and countries. Connections in dramatization are normally ill-disposed. Dramatization occurs with or without mindfulness. How every individual carries on in dramatization is unsurprising and ongoing.
It's exceedingly anticipated by identity and incredibly steady from everyday. Since we have a tendency to take in these practices in youth, we've likely been rehearsing them our entire lives. Feeling defended is the usual methodology in dramatization. In case I'm in dramatization, my definitive inspiration is to have the capacity to state, "See, I was correct!" How much time do you spend in your mind, or with your partners, supporting the negative things you do? Recall a period when you settled on a poor choice or treated somebody severely however would not like to assume liability for your conduct. What did you do? I wager you spent a ton of vitality attempting to legitimize it. It's the main way.
Dramatization: MISUSING THE ENERGY OF CONFLICT
We can rest during the evening! This is the reason show has such an adverse effect on efficiency: individuals are spending huge measures of vitality endeavoring to feel supported. Dramatization is about negative consideration conduct. People require consideration. Period. In the event that we don't get it in positive ways, we'll get it contrarily. It's the following best thing, and far superior than being disregarded.
In my first book, Beyond Drama: Transcending Energy Vampires, I delineated the six sorts of positive consideration and their negative consideration partners.
Dramatization is energized by myths. Dr. Taibi Kahler found four false convictions that fuel pain, show, and miscommunication. He called these false convictions Myths since they are exceptionally conceivable and drive our conduct, yet are truly false.
The myths are:
You can influence me to feel great inwardly.
You can influence me to feel awful inwardly.
I can influence you to feel great inwardly.
I can influence you to feel awful inwardly.
We are frequently reminded by the advisors among us that, "It's not possible for anyone to influence you to feel a specific way."
In fact genuine, yet hard to accept when dramatization strikes. Kahler's Myths help comprehend the subtleties of how we stray from the essential existential position of "I'm OK. You're OK."
These four myths are the main impetus behind dramatization. All through this book I will demonstrate how at least one of these myths prowls behind such huge numbers of the negative practices and cooperations that prompt ruinous clash. Perceiving and supplanting these myths with the standards of humane responsibility is incredibly fortifying and liberating.