This post is in response to this weeks' EcoTrain Question of the week, and Oh My! What a great way to start my first QOTW post in I-don't-know-how-long.
If I'd really let myself go here I'd have to ask you to read through half a book of my opinions. But I won't do that now so I'll try to cram it all in a smaller post.

To hug or not to hug, that is the question

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Let's just get it out there right away: I'm a hugger.
There are people I avoid but I would avoid them either way. In general, I want to hug the people that I love, like, and admire all damn day long. If there was a HugHive, trust me, I'd be ON it! The last fest of the cryptocurrency 'who's-name-we-shall-not-mention' was one heck of a hug fest and I wish I could have brought all those huggers home with me to continue the hugging.

Not in a weird way though.
I know, I'm weird.

When my friend passed away in May, I went to her house to return some items to her twin sister. The twin came out of the house and stood there awkwardly for a bit, said 'hi' and then: 'I don't know if we should hug or not, it's a bit strange. We are supposed to socially distance...' I didn't hesitate and pulled her close to wrap my arms around her. I did the same with my friend's son, even though it was the very first time we'd met in real life. God, if we have to think and worry about hugging the woman who just lost the sister she shared a womb with, or the son who lost his mother...well, then there's surely something wrong don't you think?
I know the sister is the kind of person that believes the msm narrative that's been fed to us. I know the son probably isn't. However which way you want to turn it, I didn't care. I wasn't worried that either one of us would pass anything to the other. In those circumstances, you just do...

I do understand the fear though. I know that fear will cancel out any rational thinking. Even for those who are usually very much rationally thinking. I've felt it myself. Not about this virus. Not this. But there have been moments.

I understand.

So I will be respectful to those who have that fear. I've seen what that fear can do. People jumping away from you in the street, or in the shop. The fear in their eyes if you cough. Even if it's just because you've just sat in the car and the air is dry...

When to be a shrugger

I'm a shrugger too. Not at any people but at the situation.
I've been shrugging pretty much at every main event that's been happening in the past few years.

I think I have a shoulder injury from all the shrugging over terror attacks, school shootings, and other crap talks that have been coming from governments and main stream media over the past few years. But what had me shrugging and viciously shaking my head in disbelief is the reaction of some people, to something that's so clearly NOT the way it is portrayed.

I've been shrugging at full speed at the response of those people who I thought I knew, who I thought were intelligent, clear headed thinking people, who are now tucked away in fear of something that's clearly been blown out of proportion, planned for a long time, and possibly even created, if it even exists...

I can't believe how there are SO many people who believe everything they hear on the news, when there is so much evidence to show the contrary.

If anything creeps the crap out of me, it's that.

The criminal gang the WHO changes their narrative every five minutes or so.
The governments are just taking orders and making stuff up as they go, while all of them are caught up in the web of lies and in cahoots with people who don't really care about any of them, or us.

Tests that come back either false positive or false negative.
Double counts, people who died of something else but with covid-19 being counted as a death OF Covid-19.

But then we hear hundreds, thousands of accounts from doctors, scientists, nurses and so on, people on the front lines who tell us different things altogether, but they are cast aside as if it doesn't even matter what they think. Or they are made out to be quacks and idiots.

Believe the professionals. Believe the doctors. But no, not that doctor...

And of course, there are also those in the front lines who will tell you differently.
My sister, for instance, who is a nurse in the epicentre of Covid-19 in the Netherlands. She will tell you that she nursed a few Covid-19 patients (she's a psychiatric nurse). But to be honest, if the doctors would have told her it's HIV, or Ebola, she would have believed them too wouldn't she?

I shrug at all those reactions from people who have the evidence to the contrary slapped in their faces and still try to justify the crazy measures that were taken. Of course, I understand that it's better to be safe than sorry, but this?

And then there are the people, like myself, who have seen this coming, who've been warning for these measures for years, and WE ARE STILL called conspiracy theorists. Because yeah, getting a 700 Euro fine for sitting on your own doorstep, minding your own business in Mallorca is definitely justified. They should have stayed inside like meek little citizens. We all have to cower in fear and wait until there is the all saving vaccine. For the greater good. WHATEVER the fuck that means.

The same good old 'conspiracy theorists' who've been saying that vaccines will be pushed on us one way or the other and are now proven to be right because some crazy billionaire psychopath who has his fingers, and feet in more schemes and business transactions than Hitler himself, decides that now all of a sudden he's the king of the medical and scientific world, and we all need to dance through the hoops that he has planned for us. And THANK him for it. For the greater good. (his pockets, and their plans). Those same old conspiracy theorists (realists) are still being ridiculed. I told my friend, who I thought was one of the most intelligent people I know, about these plans, and that I am sure that they WILL try to push for mandatory vaccines way before it's even close to be studied properly for safety.
She told me: 'We'll see.' I am being proven right, because everywhere we look we hear about the 'progress' being made in the development of this unicorn vaccine...And yet I AM THE CRAZY ONE???

This has been, and is still, getting to me more than any virus that may, or may not be what they say it is.

I've learned to listen to my body at quite a young age, and it was at quite a young age that I realized that I will only get sick when my body is in need of rest, and has lower immunity, or when toxins need to be removed. I'll be sick for a day or two, one week at the most, and it will all be done. I'll feel better than ever before. I've been sick with salmonella poisoning, and my body went in full 'purge-mode' for 8 full days. But after that, I felt like I could move mountains. There are people who don't understand this, because they don't listen to what their bodies tell them. In my case, I always knew that I don't have to be a scientist or doctor to know these things. So there will never be anyone who'll be able to tell me that a virus like they say exists now, will get anyone sick who comes in contact with it. It will get those sick who need the body to clear itself from crap. Yes, people die of that. But most won't. A person, a loved one dying is sad, sometimes terrible and horrific, especially if it's a child but it IS part of life, and there is nothing we can do to stop it. Mask or no mask. So I shrug at those people who let themselves get controlled by fear so much that they forget to live.

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What may or may not be...The Fear

I've had another kind of discussion with people too. I've mentioned that the fear of this will not let them think. They need to turn off their news, and even their FakeBook because it's taking their minds to places where they shouldn't go, and it's making them irrational.
Their rebuttal to this is that, no, I AM the fearful one, because I am afraid of these measures being taken (for the greater good), and I am irrational because I am afraid of freedoms taken away from us. I fear things that don't exist, like a mandatory vaccine. Restrictions. Etc. There's no arguing with these people. There is no fear in me because I know what fear feels like. I felt that fear when there was a serious threat in our lives threatening the way of life I chose for us. Threatening the removal of my children by people who thought they knew better how we should live our lives than I do. Yup, that fear was there then. But it isn't there now. Because even then, there was a moment when I realized that fear made me weak. Fear made me unable to think clearly, and that when I changed my fear into strength, I was able to overcome whatever it was that was threatening us. Just like that.

I don't even know who said this again:

There's nothing to fear but fear itself.

But whoever it was, he was a damn genius. It's true. Fear will stop you from doing pretty much anything. That time I was living in constant fear, was a time when I feel I lost myself a bit, and I lost SO much time in which I could have done constructive things. It was no good to us in any way. Fear is great when you need to run from a bear. It's not good for pretty much anything else.
However, as I said before: I understand it, because I've been there...
And that is why I believe that it's necessary for those who don't live in that fear, to work hard to get those people who do to see what's really going on. How we've been manipulated and been lied to for the longest time. Not by force but gentle nudging. Planting seeds. It's necessary because at this point in time, we couldn't be more divided. And it has to stop.
But there is no fear on my side because I am working on myself, rather than others and I have faith that it will all turn out alright. Goes around comes around, it has always been that way. It will now too.

What it's like in my part of the world

I think Ireland has been pretty crazy but probably not as crazy as some other parts of the world. It's been one of those moments when I was actually quite happy to be here. Even the house move in March was perfect timing and the perfect place to be for us. When I let things go and just let things happen, they always turn out for the best for us.
I believe that, for once, the fact that Ireland is always a bit slower than others, and a bit behind on everything, is actually a blessing.

We've had our share of craziness, like the closure of the beaches in the warmest and sunniest three months in years here. We had constant sunshine and only about 3 days of rain in 3 months, all during lock-down! Just like in most places, the belief that being out in the sun and at the beach (the beaches here are never packed...ever) to get a good dose of Vitamin D and Iodine is somehow bad for you was just insane. To me it never felt like it was any good, let alone the greater good. It's pure insanity. And control.

We had the 2 km rule. Meaning, we weren't allowed further than 2 km from our homes, unless it was for shopping. As if people would somehow be more infectious if they'd travel 2.1 km from their homes. It wasn't enforced really and I am pretty sure that most people didn't keep themselves withing those 2 km. When the rules loosened, we were 'allowed' to travel 5 km. Then 20. Then withing the county. So I was allowed to drive 50 miles to the edge of our county but not 10 miles to the next county. Go figure.
Then this week everything opened back up again, and I still see the mask wearers. But most don't. In this town, no one seems to care anymore. Social distancing is being done when it's clear that we have to. Otherwise no one seems to worry too much.

I'm not sure which I find more disturbing: the crazy measures, or the country opening back up like nothing ever happened while we constantly hear the words 'second wave coming'... If there were actually such a thing as a contagious virus, then this way of opening the country would be the most irresponsible thing to do.
Shrug again.

What I've learned

It's weird. I have a new appreciation of this country because of all this. I've spent more time outdoors and in nature than ever before. Exploring the grounds around us, the forest, the lakes, the mountains. I realized more than ever that this love/hate relationship I have with Ireland, this push-and-pull thing that I've been meddling in for these last few years, will never cease to exist.

I love this country and I hate it.

I want to run as fast as I can. And I want to stay.

I can't have both.

So I have tried to find a middle ground. And I think I've found it. We need to go, and we need to do it before the 'second wave' hits, because I know the restrictions will be more of a reality then and the craziness will be worse. But I know that Ireland will always be here. It will always be home in a way. Leaving here doesn't have to be forever, and I guess I've found my middle ground there.

I've learned that it's impossible to trust all people. Some will turn on you quicker than a storm. It's made my decision easier to make.

Sometimes it's just easier to shrug in good bye than to hug in vain.