Today I'm going to write a different type of post, a freewrite around this concept of Not Enoughness. I'm also trying something new by posting from busy.org. Hey Busy!

This freewrite is a little different than my other posts that I give myself time to write and then come back to. I just want to write a bit from the heart in a non-calculated way. The idea of Not Enoughness comes up in our household a lot.

Do you know what I mean?

The Not Enough voice inside that tells us that whoever, whatever we are isn't quite good enough to be loved. It tells us that we don't deserve to do something because other people are better at it, are smarter, already successful, look better in a certain way, etc!

The voice can take on SOOOOO many different variations and can be hard to catch, but, as we're doing in our family, we are taking stock of it and noticing it, bringing it out into the light.

I find that this voice is really debilitating. It strikes when the mood is low, after a hard day's work, or even when we wake up in the morning and sets the tone for the entire day. Perhaps you'd like to think you don't have this voice (and maybe you don't! yay!), but after talking with many friends, family members, and hearing from a multitude of people I think it's safe to say that this voice is inside many of us!!

Whether it's a generational thing, The Inner Critic, imprinting of our larger culture that sells us things based on our apparent lacks and we in turn buy into that to finally "be good enough", many of us have this voice inside.

You aren't good enough, so don't even try.
This is one way that I've noticed this voice pops up in my life. It's an inner critic that stops me from going after my dreams because it tells me I'm not good enough to manifest them anyway!

@indigoocean recently had a post talking about what our lives would look like if we asked ourselves what we want to do instead of focusing on what we don't want to do. (definitely recommend reading it!)

I think it's highly related to believing we could manifest our dreams and asking what's holding us back!

For me, it is around creativity and being an herbalist. Anytime we step out on a limb, we can get confronted with these voices. At times, they cause us to hone our projects or skills before we share them with the world and that can be positive, but they can also cripple us and our dreams and artworks (of whatever variety) never make it to the light of day to be shared because we're too afraid they aren't good enough.

I've been really feeling this trip me up lately in terms of sharing my herbal skills with the world. You may be surprised to hear that as I have been sharing posts centered around herbalism, but I'm not quite sure how to take it to the next level. I have big dreams to Be An Herbalist... and this makes me feel chagrined to even write, thinking that someone is going to judge me and say you aren't that! (Perhaps a bit of the Imposter Syndrome thrown in there too!)... You see, there are plenty of people younger than me, already successful, who know more, etc already doing it! Where can I fit in?

I definitely feel I am not good enough in this realm and so it stops be from sharing my gifts! I know it takes practice and time to really work on a craft and share it with the world. It's really my step here today to be transparent with you so that I can "face" or even "blow up" this energy of not being good enough in this realm. Because I so want to take my life in this direction and don't want to be limited anymore!!

What are your tips or ways that you break through your own inner voices and affirm your goals and dreams?

I find writing is one way that I break through- whether publicly like this or in a private journal...
Talking about it with friends...
Being honest with myself as I am here... and sharing the inner voices so they don't have so much power..
Saying affirmations and really getting real with the voices...

Okay, that's the end of my 10 minute freewrite. That actually felt a little stressful to try to write on this subject in such a fast amount of time!! Having a thorough nature (virgo here!), I am struggling with not hashing out more of what I wrote above and humorously enough, I am left wondering if my musings are "good enough" as they are! Love that... the emotion I'm writing about is itself brought up by the process of writing the article.

Anyway, I'm going to leave it at that... to share in this way. I'm sure you reading will have other ideas than me and can forgive me this once for not being as thorough or articulate as possible? ;) I really want to write to open myself up and continue my process of healing and this is a great way to do it!

Thanks for reading! Really curious to hear your thoughts on this so please leave em in the comments!! XO, Wren

On Not Being Good Enough | 10 Min Freewrite