Exploring my Temperament - EcoTrain's Question of the Week

Ecotrain's Question of the Week is back, and although the topic is a bit difficult this time, without a clear-cut answer, I was excited to see it, and would like to give my best shot at composing a reply to it. This week's prompt is:

"Describe in your own words what Temperament means to you, and what your own temperament is like. Share some positive and/or negative stories of how your temperament has affected your life."

Temperament? The first thing that comes to my mind are the four temperaments, or personality types derived from Hippocrates' humor theory: Sanguine, Melancholic, Phlegmatic, and Choleric. The other meaning of the word, especially when it describes someone (or something) as temperamental, is usually equated with impulsiveness, emotionalism, stubbornness, and going your own way.

Looking up Temperament on Wikipedia opened up a whole can of worms relating to the various models and theories in a number of sciences, including philosophy, psychology, neuroscience, and overlapping fields. The study of temperament ranges from the classification of infants, to our levels of empathy, and the regularity of our bodily functions. Instead of digging myself into a long and tedious analysis of these various schools of thought, I'd rather talk about how I see temperament and where my own personality falls.

Defining Temperament: How We React to Situations

I can't help but going back to the Four Classical Temperaments we learned about in school, and the example illustrating their reaction to a problem: A Sanguine, a Melancholic, a Phlegmatic, and a Choleric are walking through the woods, and they come upon a log blocking their way. What do they do? The Sanguine jumps over it, the Melancholic turns around and walks back, the Phlegmatic walks around it, and the Choleric pushes it to the side. So each temperament reacts to the same problem in a different way.

source: Pixabay

While I may not agree that there are exactly four types of temperament, I think reaction to some outside event or circumstance is a key factor. Also, I think temperament comes from deep down. It is not planned, learned, or controlled, but purely instinctive. With this, I think I'm in accord with what I've mentioned so far about Temperament.

So Where Do I Stand?

This is probably the hardest part to answer. What are my reactions like when things get difficult? Is there, in fact, any one certain pattern that I follow? Honestly, I'm not sure. In these introspective issues it is generally easier to have someone else tell me (to which I may react with incredulity, though realizing that they may be right, precisely since one tends to ignore the proverbial beam in one's own eye). But anyway, taking in consideration my own bias, here are some examples of my own temperament:

"Okay, If That's How We Play...!"

Living in Mexico City I don't have to look too long and hard to find stressful situations. Riding the public transports provides me with more than enough examples, almost daily. As we all know, the proper etiquette dictates to let people get off before you board the train / bus, etc. This is the case here as much as in Europe, and most people have no problem with standing in line. Most, however, doesn't apply to all! Occasionally there is someone appearing out of nowhere, who pushes his way in front of me. And while I generally consider myself as patient and easygoing, in these circumstances I just see my arm stretching out, grabbing the person by the shoulder, and pulling him back (usually it is a him).

Another example of adopting some behavioral trait I do not appreciate in others is responding to assumptions, usually having to do with my fair skin and "blonde" hair. There have been so many times that people continue talking to me in (relatively bad) English, even after I've told them in Spanish that I prefer to speak in Spanish. Sometimes they even tell me unabashedly that my appearance is a straight give away, and that I'm most certainly a gringo. And telling them that I'm most certainly NOT, doesn't change their assumptions either. So then I tend to ask them how to say "buenos dias" in their language. What follows is a bewildered "buenos dias = buenos dias" until I reply that according to their appearance they should speak some indigenous language.

Both of these situations have occurred several times, and in most cases they have led to some conflict. The pushy character on the bus gets offended that I touched him, to which I have no right, and besides he is in a hurry, or has some other weirdly (un)related excuse that justifies his cutting in front of me. Similarly, the one insisting on me being a gringo finds it offensive of me to assume that he's an Indio, generally an insult among many Mestizos. Worst thing is, I know exactly the reaction my behavior is going provoke. Still, the momentary feelings of frustration and anger make me want to use this kind of outlet. Is this what they call being passive-aggressive? Anyway, being clear-headed, I'm not proud of this, but when I'm in those situations I tend to feel compelled to show them a mirror, futile though it may be.

"Screw You Guys, I'm Going Home!"

Another way I have observed myself reacting to unpleasant situations is by throwing in the towel... or simply letting go. Which expression is more appropriate depends on the situation, but also in how you interpret it. Here is one that could be either:

One time we got majorly screwed by our Internet provider. Not only did we receive sub-standard service that month (being disconnected for days on end, without anyone attending to it, despite numerous complaints) but we got OVERCHARGED by about half of what we normally pay. Whether it was an honest mistake or deliberate exploitation of the customers, my wife reported it to the PROFECO, the government agency for consumer protection. I never thought they would do anything, and indeed it took them half a year to respond, but in the end they managed to get the Internet company to pay some money for the missed service and the overcharged fees.

Of course, the money went to them, not to us, and we were given an appointment to come into their office to pick up the money. So I went. I stood in line for a good 15 minutes, left my ID at the front desk, waited in line for another half an hour, then I was called into the office of whomever was in charge, only to be told to come back the next day because... I honestly don't remember the reason they gave me. That's when I told the guy that I was not interested in the money any more. At home I gave my wife the equivalent, I took out of my own pocket, explaining that the PROFECO may be all good for show, but the actual money is clearly not worth the effort.

There have been similar examples where I abandoned something I had been pursuing, simply because I got tired of things not working properly. In certain cases this can be laudable as taking a step back, reassessing what's really important, and so on. In other cases, such as right now, having related my experience with the PROFECO, I can't help but feel like a spoiled child.

Feeling Naked... or at least Nude

So that's it, I've explored my deepest personality, dug up something I could call my Temperament, and shared its stories with the world... that is, with the Ecotrain community. As a result I feel as if I had taken off all my clothes. Exposed for certain, but at the same time honest. And since this is the way I am, there is no reason trying to pretend otherwise, which gives me strength. And while I don't have a problem with being nude, I am not naked, a term which implies vulnerability. All in all I'm happy about sharing this with you all, and look forward to reading the posts on your temperaments!