Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to my neighbourhood. It's a beautiful semi-residential part of this great city, London. There are many awesome things here - popular amenities, a train station, several busses, a post office, our very own fire station, two large supermarkets and several small ones, a collection of pubs, restaurants and everything you can ever want.
Apart from live a great life, and get around London very easily, there are other amazing things you can do here too. Our gardens, grass patches, flower hedges and other such vegetation double as trash eaters! That's right.
If you were ever in my neighbourhood and find yourself in possession of a finished bottle of coke, or an empty pack of cigarettes, simply throw it a the nearest bit of flower beatification you can see. Our hedges are particularly designed to swallow plastic bags full of trash, used or unused napkins from fast food restaurants and random pieces of plastic packaging.
Wait, there's more! If you visited our local KFC and ordered a bucket meal and then realised you can't finish it because you're just the one person? Fear not. Simply chuck the bucket meal, complete with any packaging and plastic bag directly on our roads. It's amazing, the chickens animate themselves at night and deposit themselves in the nearest bin. It's like magic. Please try this if you're ever in my hood. It's one of our favourite past times over here - chucking unfinished fast food on roads.
Are you in a hurry driving through my neighbourhood and cant stop for some trash trowing fun? We have you covered. You can reach for any trash in your car and throw it right out through your window. See how easy that is? No trash in the car? We got ya, again. You can flick your cigarette butts out of the car at will, but preferably at or near the petrol station. Not a smoker? Then why not spit a few times as you drive past a bus stop? You can play target the shoes. It's so much fun.
I really do hope you get to visit my hood one day, so you can see what you've been missing all this time.
Peace and Love ✌🏿
Adé
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