Humans have a function called an Adrenaline Rush, aka the body hitting the “oh shit” button. Sugar and caffeine trigger something similar to it, but have a mild drawback. A level 2 deathworlder that have the “oh shit” button learned the difference between the two the hard way -- Anon Guest
Adrenaline works by using all available body reserves for a desperate effort. The price is generally paid afterwards in the form of assorted injuries and the recovery from the same. That is, assuming it isn't paid in the user's demise during the desperate effort. Sugar piles on extra resources and effectively supercharges the body for a short amount of time. Caffeine, a little more complex, shuts down the 'tired' signals in mind and body whilst also accelerating the heart rate - thus fooling the body into thinking it's awake. Humans often use the combination of caffiene and sugar as a booster. They do not, as rumour suggests, boost it with Adrenaline.
Unfortunately for Tresk, they had heard the rumour and didn't bother asking any Humans about it. Not their fault, the ships' Humans were all N'Ozzies and genetically obligated to agree with and embellish any lie they heard[1]. Other sources on the free infonets were... conflicted at best, and conflagrations at worst. Most of the conflagrations were started by, of course, N'Ozzies[2]. Therefore, the only true way to discover fact from fiction was to try it themself.
This, of course, is not recommended for any species more delicate than a Class 2 Deathworlder. Fortunately for Tresk, they were a Class 2 Deathworlder and on the harder end of that particular classification bracket. Therefore they did what any Deathworlder would do. They live-blogged their experiences for science. Havenworlders, don't even look at trying this at home.
Experiment one: Rumoured mix of caffeine, sugar, and adrenaline. Recommended minimum dose in one cup, Tresk wrote. Initial impact - terrible taste. Waiting for digestion to transfer chemicals to body is slow torture. The digestive system delivered most things slowly, and the blood carrying it gradually imbued the body with the chemicals unnecessary. Hour 1. I think it's working. Sugar did the heavy lifting at first, but after 15 minutes, the caffeine kicked in. No sign of Adrenal rush. Day continues as normal, minimal tremula.
Hour 2. Report to sick bay. Apparently you are not supposed to ingest adrenaline. Outline second experimental format that involves injection of all source materials. Sent to mental wellness assessment.
Hour 5. Want more coffee. Forestalling until Plan B is solidified.
Three days passed without further incident, then a spate of scientific articles about preparing 'blood ready' caffeine, glucose, and adrenaline. Recommended daily doses, procedures, and safety warnings included. The next day, an enormous disclaimer stating that this was not recommended by any physician and the preparation in question should not be used for anything short of an emergency.
I am taking the shot, wrote Tresk. Time elapsed between shot and noticing effects, 15 seconds. I am aware of everything around me. My heart feels like it wants to explode.
After a minute. OTOH, not even a huge tranq shot can take me down. Whatever's coming, I am ready for it.
Two minutes: Scared away Vorax raiders. No fair.
Five... Botany survey wanted tree samples. Uprooted tree. May have overdone it.
Seven... Bowels purging part of the adrenaline process. Heavy shakes, too.
Eight... Also guts purging the other way. Hurgh. Not fun.
Nine... Ssshakign os bad i cnat tyep wnat 2 die feellllls so sikc.
Fifteen. Ship's Medic kept me in warm, soft space and fed me as many antidotes as she could. I'm feeling much better now that it's worn off. Never doing that again.
Twenty. Still want another coffee though.
Having satisfactorily mashed the "oh shit" button for their own body, Tresk's curiosity was sated. However, there was an alarming trend amongst Deathworlders that involved, The Caffeine Adrenaline Challenge.
[1] It used to be any lie they heard about Australia, N'Oz, or the N'Ozzies themselves. It has since expanded to lies about Earth and Humans as well. They are, therefore, the worst Humans to consult about anything Human.
[2] "Taking the piss" is considered a planetary passtime, as is "Bullshitting".
[Image (c) Can Stock Photo / zetwe]
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