Preface: So this is what's known as a "FreeWrite". What that means is that All the words here are directly from my mind. No filters. Other than grammar and formatting, I did not change a single word below. This is an exercise meant to encourage flow of writing as well and thoughts and overcoming the "writing block" fallacy.
When
you finished a 10 minute freewrite on the TheMostDangerousWritingApp and then accidentally hit "Start Again".
And then, following on the train of thought from the deleted freewrite (which is lost to oblivion by the way, sorry guys). I then go into rumination of what literary crap I've just spewed and then wonder if it's better off if i just not posted that..
But no, i must shake my face, give it a slap or two. tell myself "i must follow on with the flow do another freewrite, but this time not on that god damn risking another wipeout (nothing wrong with the app btw, its just me). And do it again.
I think I have felt what most content creators feel in their early days of content creation. I hope its only in the early days though. I have no idea how to live if this felling is something every content creator have to live with forever.
You know.. that feeling of looking at what you've done and then see how crappy it is. and then you ask yourself "whats the point of living".
There is 3 things I cringe to nowadays on the daily basis.
- Reddit r/cringe
- Some people's comment on Steemit (Good work great multiplication follow me sir)
- My own video/writing draft.
Well text can be tolerable. But video. owh my goodness.. the cringe of looking at yourself and hearing your own sound trying to talk like the smart-ass you know you probably are.
That's the worst.
I really have no idea how vloggers can look at their own video and not cringe till they look like a pickled avocado skin.
How? seriously, how..
I have literally tens of raw videos lying in my hard drive that I'll probably never post online.. lying there.. in digital cemetery.
I've always kept on telling people that "I'm trying to get into making videos" but a quick look at my profile and you'll see about about.... 3 videos.. and one of them is literally a 6 second footage of Elon Musk. So technically only 2.
Why? because the other 33 is in the hard disk cemetery. Maybe it's just my mood for this past two months.. maybe I just have to get over it. maybe I have to do some other type of contents. because im still very adamant into getting the video space of the Steem Blockchain.
No way im missing out on the Dtube / Dlive craze.
In terms of vlogging, one Steemian that i'm a fan of is this awesome guy @spenceryan. I was back there back then when he was still making forex videos on facebook and see him jump the fence to the Steem blockchain. If there is a First Dtube Vlogger Superstar, it's gotta be him.
I know there are others out there yes. But who would you rather support, some already famous guy with already great income from vlogging on Youtube jumping here to "try things out". Or someone that goes all it and builds his brand and audience right here in this platform.
I'll take the latter Anyday. Whats the point of being a Steemian when one dont support those that hustles here. Yea call me tribalistic but that's how i feel. Not that I "hate" already famous people (i never say that). Just that i rather support those that pour their heart out to this platform and this platform only.
which is why i super duper support the TeamMalaysians that does the same like @branlee87 (whose's podcast you can now only find on Dsound) and @Danieldoughty who sure, posts on Youtube but uses that only as hosting platform. All his stuff and time spent online are here bros.
And again, how do you guys so it? how do not watch your vids or listen to your sounds and not hate it?
Really beats me.
Perhaps some day soon i'll be a man, grow a pair and get over it.
Kristian Kho [Ian] is a 24 year old freelancer with a passion for steem and a deep desire to be a better person in every aspect. I aim to express any and all my thoughts on things that I find interesting as well as using this platform as a self-development log.
I am a part of #Teammalaysia, a decentralized community initiative that aims to empower local creatives and content creators specifically in Malaysia to create content through the Steem Blockchain.
If you want to stalk me, check out my other social media accounts too!
