DISCLAIMER
I don't think that I should use NSFW tag for this post, you will not see any of disturbing images, only the words which can be taken as "funny" and they are addressed to no one. If you don't like it, simply do not read it.
Thank you
Yesterday my Italian tourists asked me to teach them some swears in Croatian. First I said the words and those sounded funny to them. But then I translated... Francesca almost got a stroke and covered her daughter's (who is 24) ears with her hands and Stefano almost got his pants pissed by laughing. When we broke the ice of decency, their hunger for Croatian swears grew bigger and they kept asking for more and more.
Those swears cannot be translated just like that, they sound a little bit weird, so I will give you a few examples. Let's start with the easy ones, that don't insult anyone. When you say in English "I don't give a shit" or "I don't give a fuck" it means that you don't care about something. And we, in Croatia, we say: "BOLI ME KURAC" which literally means "My dick hurts". No matter are you a woman or a man, but if you live in Croatia, you say "BOLI ME KURAC" at least 3 times in a day. And that swear is the easiest one. Check the table and enter the depths:
| CROATIAN | ENGLISH |
|---|---|
| Jebem ti mliko materino | I fuck your mother's milk |
| Mrš u pičku materinu | Go to your mother's pussy! |
| Nabijem te na kurac | I'll stick you on my dick |
| Navući ću ti pičku preko glave | I'll stretch your cunt over your head |
| Vrag ti pamet odnija | May the Devil take away your brain |
| Tko te jebe? | Who gives a fuck about you? |
| Puši kurčinu | Suck a big dick |
| Jeba ti pas mater | A dog fucked your mother |
| Pička ti se ogadila | May you find a pussy repulsive |
| Jebo te patak | A duck fucked you |
You see? Many of these swears are kinda pointless in English while in Croatian you clearly inform your interlocutor what you think about him.
Swears are generally considered as something bad, but there are certain health benefits in them. For example, let's say that you're trying to do something and something always goes wrong. Then just turn around and say a few loud swears. Feel better? Got rid of some extra energy?
When you are angry, disturbed or nervous, a few greasy swears should ease the problems. That doesn't mean that you should tell them to a certain person or insult someone, just say them to ease your soul. If that doesn't sound nice to you, try in a foreign language.