Hey, people! Today's is an entry to another challenge. This time I was nominated by our @ruth-girl for this as seen here :
https://steemit.com/funnyexperience/@ruth-girl/mr-jinx-funny-relationship-experience-challenge
Well much like @ruth-girl my funny story also takes place by the sea side. Not the beautiful resort town she paints a picture of though. Mine takes place on the nasty brown waters of the gulf of Mexico down on Galveston beach. A group of us go down there together kinda like a couples night out. It was about an hours drive from our place in sweaty Houston. I wouldn't call her my girlfriend we were more of a friends with benefits scenario. We both knew it. We swim all day and get pretty liquored up, all the guys start a bond fire on the beach because that is what a bunch of guys do. We love lighting shit on fire. It goes back to the dawn of man and our love of fire. So we are all sitting around drinking our Natty light beer (which is the most ECO friendly beer because it is made of 99.9% filter domestic cat piss) and feeling invincible. About an hour or two of this and someone guides their hand straight down my pants. WOOOO hello! So we sneak off and I am crazy excited, I mean they actually named a drink after this...... Sex on the beach......... so it has to be good right?
WRONG
The joke "someone has sand in her vagina" from Southpark. Yeah that is a real thing. At first you get in there and everything seems good. A couple strokes later and you are in for a bad fucking surprise my friend. Imagine someone giving you an Indian sunburn on your willy. Not fucking cool. It wasn't any better on her end either. Not sure of how to explain her experience but it seemed equally as awful. And that is why to this day I have never been able to drink a sex on the beach mixed drink. It just brings up to many bad memories.
Use the #funnyexperience tag
Nomination time:
@profanereviews
@beeyou lol
@mysearchisover
@amariespeaks
@johndoer123
@cryptkeeper17
@dj123
edit @pangoli is an alternate since half of these turds will not participate or prude out.
I have to ask for 7 other people to take part in this (if they wish too, of course):