Mave Longborn felt every step she took. She counted her heartbeats, each one sounding like a bass drum. She stared forward in a daze, like a person walking to the gallows.
It will all be over soon, Mave. One step. Now another. You can do it. It’ll be easier on the other side.
She hoped she was right. Clutching the dark slab to her breast she found herself suddenly at the Sector Administration stairs. Had she passed those other strolling people, those who had made fun of her? Had they looked on her with pity, regretting their earlier behavior?
One step. Then another. Now she was at the top of the stairs and walking through the automatic doors. Inside there were a few people about the hustle and bustle of their everyday business. It seemed odd that no one seemed to notice her as she walked to the front desk.
“Yes?” The desk clerk said.
“I- I’m Mave Longborn,” she said, praying she wouldn’t have to explain further. The man at the desk looked her up, down, and nodded solemnly. "Give me the slab and take this pass card. Follow the hall over there to the end, it’s the third door from the back. Wait there."
Mave crossed to the other wall of the large area just inside the main door, where the hall was. She looked down at the white square in her hand. It was like the opposite of the black slab in a way. Small and demanding to be shown as much as the black slab was large and crying to be hidden.
“Johim. Look!” said one of two boys slightly older than her in a whisper. The other, Johim, a boy with shaggy red hair falling over an eye, looked over at her, then down at the card in her hand.
“Been awhile since I’ve seen a white card,” he said simply, watching her go.
The hall was long with a sterile white light that Mave was sure made her ugly. When she approached the door it opened, beckoning her to an ominous darkness. Her new life lay on the other side.
When the door closed behind her a low purple glow lit the otherwise blank room. A wall lit up and a calm, serene voice gave instructions.
“Welcome to the deselect status briefing. You have been deemed, by lottery, examination, or circumstances, to be a poor match for reproduction. I am M.O.T.H.E.R., and I am here to guide you into what comes next.”
A portion of the floor of the room morphed into a chair as if rising from a vat of liquid whose surface it never quite broke before solidifying. Mave marveled at the technology. She’d never seen it, before.
“Tap your white card against the lit wall and take a seat.”
When Mave tapped her card against the wall, the previously blank side acquired her picture and an id number. The chair, she was surprised to find, was slightly spongy and soft to sit in.
“This is your deselect identification. Before we begin, be clear that all information in this briefing is classified. Any repetition of the information in this room may be met with information quarantine or expungement of exposed individuals.”
Mave raised an eyebrow. This wasn’t sounding good.
“Your white card gives you access to any sector below A sector. This is 90% of New Cradle. Deselect status individuals earn 50% energy credits for work done, but are paid amply for travel. Deselect status individuals may mate and choose partners freely but have permanent birthing restrictions and may not reside with non-deselect individuals for more than one Earth week. Transport, lodging, and board are always free. Do not misplace your white card. Staying in one sector longer than one Earth month is discouraged, and will be met with a 1% energy credit penalty to all surrounding citizens. If at any time you have further questions, please visit a white room located at the Sector Administration building in the sector you are located. Please go immediately to your domicile after leaving this room.”
The low purple glow disappeared and the lit wall went blank as the room lit with normal light, rendering it perfectly white. The door to the hall opened.
Mave looked at her id on the way out of the building, filled with mixed emotions. She tapped the screen and saw her picture and id number appear along with more information that hadn’t been there before. With a shock she noticed that a section labeled ‘Birthing Status’ had ‘Permanently Locked’ next to it. Had it been done somehow while she was in that room?
The rumors about travel were true, but not in any way she had suspected. Deselect status meant that she would have to give up everything she had ever known. Family. Friends. Days spent in Harper's barn or near the small pond in Lynn’s family garden. It was all over. She stopped dead in her tracks as she realized that she would have to explain all of this to her parents. She couldn’t imagine that they already knew, or they would never have taken the chance that she would choose the lottery. Waves of regret washed over her tinged with the edges of a newborn panic.
“Longborn?” Said a voice next to her. It was a woman in a blue uniform with white gloves and a helmet. When Mave didn’t answer, but stared at the woman dumbly, the woman looked down at the white card in Mave’s hand to verify her identity. “Follow me, please.”
Mave did so without question, getting inside of an officially marked Sector Administration vehicle. For some reason the entirety of the back was transparent, but the front had heavily tinted windows. There was some sort of device on top.
The woman opened the door to the back and gestured for Mave to enter without looking her in the eye. After closing the door behind her the woman got in the front and pressed a button. Mave could hear the doors seal and pores open to allow air in.
The woman put her finger on the button to start the vehicle but paused a moment. Without looking back at Mave, she spoke in a slightly broken voice.
“Just hang in there. This will be over soon.”
As the woman moved onto the road Mave began to notice the other people looking at her. Some of them were walking, others riding in autocabs or on electric scooters. Some were alone, some with their spouses. Many of them she recognized. She had grown up with these people, been one of them.
The woman pressed another button on the dashboard screen and Mave heard a slight screech.
“Deselect Mave Longborn leaves our fair sector in disgrace, bid her goodbye.” The woman’s voice was amplified loudly through the box on top of the vehicle. The people around her looked with horror, but the woman in the front seat continued to chant the same sentence over and over.
“Deselect Mave Longborn leaves our fair sector in disgrace, bid her goodbye.” Mave tried to slouch, tried to cover her face with her hands to prevent being seen as much as to hide the tears beginning to wet her face. Of course, it was useless in a completely transparent back compartment.
Mave closed her eyes and dreamt of better times. Lynn’s easygoing smile. Harper’s focused demeanor and rough hands. Little details that made it easier as her shame was announced over and over endlessly. Finally she felt the vehicle stop and the door open.
“It’s over now. There’ll be a someone from S.A. inside your domicile.”
Mave looked up at the woman’s face. Her expression was hard, stern, but tinged with something - sadness? Had she done this many times?
As the woman had said there was a man in a similar blue Sector Administration uniform inside her home.
“Where are my mother and father?” Mave said, her voice wavering and her breath uneven.
“Please go to your living area and pack whatever items you need. I have placed a number of packs in your room for you to use. You have one hour.”
It was all scripted, clearly. When Mave didn’t move but instead crossed her arms the man stepped forward and his expression softened.
“After an hour the person outside will escort you from the sector whether you’ve packed or not. If you don’t cooperate I have to escort you out by any means. Please don’t make me.”
It was then that Mave noticed the holster on the man’s hip. It looked like a sedation device used at the hospital. But it was clearly a different design.
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