I'm not a hardcore gamer or anything like that although I consider myself a very occasional gamer. It doesn't matter which device or platform, whether it be in mobile, computer, or in a console... I would still find myself playing some games even though I don't really spend a lot of time on it.
History of Gaming
I used to play a lot as a kid. Well of course with toys and my imagination, cards with my brother (even though I didn't really understand it much lol), and games played outside with friends/neighbors. When we got a console (more like bootleg nintendo haha), we were so stoked we just played a lot. I can't even count the times we broke the controllers.
Until computers became more popular and we got our first family computer when I was maybe 9. We installed a lot of games in it. The earliest game I remember that we installed there was Red Alert.. and then Counter Strike and Dota. Since we didn't have any internet connection, we would just play with bots (computer) instead of having a LAN party or with you know real people on the internet. :P
Because of this, I played a lot of single player games cos they don't need internet for that. I enjoyed being able to play with missions and save my own progress in games.
I played a lot of different genres of games. Platformers, strategy, first-person shooters, fighting, bruh even fucking sports I would play them cos I was so bored there was no internet haha. The genre that I enjoyed a lot more than the rest tho was puzzle games.
One of the games that I really enjoyed and played countless times already was Half Life: Source. It's a first person shooter with the right balance of combat, puzzles, and platforming. I enjoy these genres and when I found out about the game it was just perfect lol.
The combats were quite difficult but what's more difficult in my opinion were the puzzles and platforming. God forbid the platforming in this because it feels slippery as hell so you gotta be extra careful in a lot of areas not to fall. I can't count how many times I've been so frustrated cos I just kept on falling so you really develop some patience with this game. :P
And the puzzles! I really love a game that forces me to think.
My set up
In 2021, I got rid of my gaming laptop and replaced it with a Macbook. My workspace consisted of Apple-only products as it was so convenient as an ecosystem for my art. I said to myself "meh I don't really need gaming since I'm gonna be focusing on my art" but jokes on me I still craved gaming lol. A few months after I bought a Nintendo Switch. XD
I thought I also already have a very powerful laptop but dumbass me didn't really think about laptop gpu isn't the same with a PC gpu. Besides, gaming on Macbook doesn't do it.. So I got myself my first PC. :D
I'm just at awe at how beautiful this looks. I can even add an RGB fan at the bottom but that's not a priority now so. :D
"gurl gamer"
I am pretty much aware of sexism happening in a male-dominated gaming world. They think only boys are allowed to game, that only games like CS:GO are the only games exist, and so on. In fact, when I was buying the PC, I had it built in the store because I didn't wanna bother with building it (I have no idea how to connect and shit) and as they were building it, one customer was amazed of the set-up and asked whose PC was that... He was surprised it was for me even tho I was literally sitting in front of it.
Then he was amazed by how powerful and sick it looks like, and proceeded to ask me:
"What about your partner, is he okay with this? Or are you the only gamer?"
He asked because I have a powerful GPU, 4070 Ti.
I then told him "No, he has a 4090."
Then he was like "4070... for a girl..." and walked away.
XD
That man instantly felt insecure about a female getting a more powerful PC than him as if only males deserve it. Also made it seem like my boyfriend will be insecure as well, bitch in fact he was the one who encouraged me. And that's not the only sexism I experienced and I haven't even started yet. :P
I have no problem with the term "girl gamer" although I hope it's gonna be used less now as gaming has no gender. I understand where it's coming from though.
Recording gameplays
Anyway, I really just like watching gameplays of other players that I got motivated on doing so my own.
I'm a very awkward person and let's not even talk about the cringe I feel when I hear my voice but I'm getting less cringe the more I listen to it lol. I had a lot of comments about my voice since I was a kid so I'm always conscious about it.
So with a gaming account, my goal is to record some gameplays and be silly on cam. Finally going out of my comfort zone and maybe start not giving a fuck about things too much.
What games I'm interested so far
I'm currently playing Dying Light and Valorant so far. I don't play much Valorant cos my aim sucks and I panic cos multiplayer games aren't really for me but it's good to go out of my comfort zone from time to time.
I have plenty of games saved on my Steam wishlist that I will be trying soon which are mostly puzzle and horror games.
Why horror games tho
I have PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and I have nightmares a lot of times and although I don't get scared of them anymore, I think playing horror games will help me to confront those scary dreams and simulate these things so I'll know how to act when I'm in a scary environment. Oh I haven't mentioned I have lucid dreams a lot of times as well so being conscious in a bad dream is not pretty. :P
Oh and why I'm wearing a wig? That's because showing my real hair makes me so recognizable irl and I don't want that. That one time I was a teenager I got quite a lot of "friends" on Facebook (of course I don't know most of them) and a lot of times some stranger would just recognize me on the streets and be like "you're [my name] right???". It just makes me paranoid haha and besides these wigs are better than my hair soooo.
Where is the account bitch
Lmao I talked too much.
So my gameplays will be posted on @hiddenblad3 (go follow it!!).
I know, I can just post gameplays here on this account using communities but I figured this account is very chop suey already with art, personal, photography, travels, etc. and I want a dedicated account for gaming. This account is too personal as well and I want to link a Hive account on Youtube and I don't want to link my personal account on that.
The videos will be uploaded on Youtube as well so subscribe if you want. :P