THE BOLD.
This is the typa guy who does not mince words. He will conclude without even beginning by letting you know that he has noticed your presence on social media, is interested in you, wants your phone number and would like to meet you. He will even suggest a day and the venue. These are people that aced summary writing in school.
THE BEATER ABOUT OF BUSHES. Now this nigger knows what he wants…or not.. but rather than move in a straight line, he will climb mountains, swim across oceans and rivers, trek through deserts, make his way through the International Date line, make a revolution around the Sun before he finally gets to the point. By the time he arrives, you are old and grey with great grand children and you have edited your will eleven times.
THE PREACHER. This brother in Christ does not want to see you roast in hell so every morning; he will arise and generously send you Scripture accompanied by an explanation and concluded with a prayer. He is determined to win souls for Christ and you are lucky to be among one of his cyber friends that will see the Pearly Gates, should you heed his advice.
THE GHOST. This person always camps in your inbox, but you know absolutely nothing about him because his Timeline has no proof of his existence whatsoever. It could even be a “she” using a male pseudonym. No pictures, no info and the few times that they post, it is in some alien handwriting that might have its origins in the Andromeda galaxy. Their activity on social media involves sharing strange videos and that is it.
THE ROBOT. This inboxer has pre-recorded messages in his brain that he repeats over and over again each time he slides into the DMs. Nothing ever changes. It is hello, how are you, hello how are you day in, day out. Very tiring!
THE BORED SOUL. This person is alive only because they are inhaling and exhaling. They are not living, simply existing which is why the most interesting thing they do is lazily forward whatever has been forwarded to them, because he has chosen you to be among the 9 that he has been instructed to forward to. Unfortunately, you are ALWAYS among his 9 victims. Very annoying!
THE PORN STAR. These are males who send unsolicited pictures of their disgusting genitals. I shall not even waste precious letters of the Alphabet on these ones because they get blocked ASAP.