JUST FOR JOKES
After 4 years of selfless service, I realized that I had not been promoted, no salary increment, no commendation.
So I decided to walk up to my HR Manager. The manager looked at me, smiled and asked me to sit down saying: "My friend you have not worked here for even a single day!"
I was shocked to hear this, but the manager went on to explain. And here's the conversation that took place:
Manager: How many days are there in a year?
Me: 365 days and sometimes 366.
Manager: Do you come to work on weekends?
Me: No sir.
Manager: How many days are there in a year that are weekends?
Me: 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equals to 104 days.
Manager: Thanks for that. If u remove 104 days from 366 days. how many days
do you now have?
Me: 262 days
Manager: How many hours make up a day?
Me: 24 Hours.
Manager: How long do you work in a day?
Me: 10am to 6pm
(i.e. 8 hours a day.)
Manager: So, what fraction of the day do you work in hours?
Me: 8/24
i.e 1/3 (one third).
Manager: This is nice of you! what is 1/3rd of 262 days?
Me: 87
(1/3 x 262 = 87days)
Manager: I do give you 2 weeks sick leave, 15 days casual leave, 5 days optional leave, 30 days earned leave every year. Now remove that 64 days from the 87 days left. How many days do u have remaining?
Me: 23 days.
Manager: Do you work on festivals ? (20 days)
Me: No Sir!
Manager: Do you work on Republic Day?
Me: No sir!
Manager: Do you come to work on Independence Day?
Me: No sir!
Manager: So how many days are left?
Me: 1 day sir!
Manager: Do you come to work on New Year's Day..?
Me: No sir..!!
Manager: So how many days are left?
Me: None Sir!
Manager: So what are you claiming?
Me: I have understood, Sir. I did not realise that I was stealing company
money all these days.
Moral - NEVER GO TO HR FOR HELP!!!
(HR= HIGH RISK.)