A few days ago I stumbled on a back entrance to Buttermilk while exploring the Bridge to Nowhere I was short on time, so I just did a quick walk around. The following day I went back to take on the many stairs to the top.
Completely worth every huff and puff, XD!
When I arrived at the overlook I scooted my butt to the edge of the back wall and just chilled for awhile, letting my brain run amok.
I have a notepad on my phone that I use to jot down all manner of things. From shower and pooper thoughts to comments I haven't yet decided to make, to responses I may or may not- -sometimes it's more Should I or Shouldn't I- give.
Looking through them while I sat there, I decided some of them are pretty damn good quotes. And all of them show an honest glimpse into my overactive brain. So I thought Why not do a dreemit stream of consciousness post?
A journey through my mind while we journey up a gorge post :0)
Hope you Enjoy!
The only question worth pondering of the unknowable unanswerable questions, is whether this place persists without me, or not.
I got swept up in the debate madness for about a year, but the first time I caught myself feeling actual dislike for someone I love just because we didn't see eye to eye, I snapped out of it. Broke the damn spell, and thank f$cking goodness for that. Now I'm just an occasional audience member who knows that I'm in the audience.
They break out of one box into a bigger box, the edges of which they haven't seen yet. That's why I always assume I'm still in a box, so I'm constantly on alert to find the edges.
In the first Hunger Games the childhood boyfriend said "what if we all just didn't watch it?" And that's how simple it really is, they'd have no reason to continue the show if they didn't have an audience for it.
I used to be the world's biggest optimist, believing everyone was capable of growing, evolving, learning; seeing only their beautiful potential to be the best version of themselves.
Empathy is often 180° opposite of what most people think. True empathy sometimes looks like cruelty, but it isn't, it's what you do when you truly care about someone.
What good is being a bright light when everyone around you is wearing blindfolds? Many of them tying it on themselves willfully?
I was angry, depressed and heavily disillusioned. I hated feeling that way, which made me even more disgusted with people, for falling so far short of my expectations.
Christian monks shaved the center of their heads, while Jewish people wore a patch over that center instead..why is that? I've always wondered.
I'm not the same as I was, but that's no longer a bad thing (most of the time), just different.
So many possibilities when it comes to the mystery of this place. Where we came from, why we arrived here, where we go next... Which means so many potential reasons for why things are as they are.
Maybe it's simply that some of us have lived more lifetimes, therefore we have more experience and are more advanced.
Watching my young adult children heading into life has taught me that there is no substitute for experience. People can't fully learn from the mistakes of others any more than they could know the taste of chocolate from someone describing it.
We're all on a journey, just starting at different times. And while I still think it's great to help someone on their path, I now know they have to want to be helped. Otherwise they're just not ready, and that's okay, it's not my place to set their timeline.
And once again, life is beautiful.
I’ve been awake for a long time, at first I was buzzing with excitement but now after all this time and no change I’m bruised and battered my friend.
There are so many stages in this process. The disillusionment is one of the worst, I was there for a long while. But I swear to you, when you come through the other side of that, it gets so much better.
It's a refocusing on ourselves, on being the change without expecting it from others.
I finally understood that it's not about finding peace or happiness or love, it's about Being these things. "I am peace. I am happiness. I am love".
Don't hope for a great day, or year, or life...Make it great. It's up to you.
We can't always change our circumstance, but we can always change our perspective.
Adolescence and the hormones that go with it were probably the most challenging as a parent, but only in the sense that we had to be careful not to make too light of anything, or let anything be too heavy. To assure them whatever they were feeling was normal, while not making them feel like whatever they were experiencing was trivial because "everyone goes through it".
I have to remember that people like raw and real, just as I do. Sometimes I can veer toward more formalities, which is definitely a clinger from growing up in a religious, proper (no swearing) household. I have to remind myself at times to write for me.
"Know Thyself" and "To thine own self be true" are quotes I put at the beginning of every fictional story.. I need to do the same with everything I write.
It's not a criticism of my upbringing- one of unconditional love and confidence building no matter the imperfections- but everything can be improved upon.
Yup, they're running a script, but I'm not mad because I think it's very likely that we, or a lot of us anyway, knew before we jumped into the womb what we were signing on for.
We were like Hell yeah, I'm up for the challenge, toss me into the earth game, put me smack dab into the technological and digital transition revolution chapter, oh and Acts 2020-2024 sound like hella fun! 😆
We have to be some crazy, adventurous fools to be like "wipe my memories and start me out as a helpless infant"
The nice thing about entertaining these thoughts, I'm taking personal responsibility, so no one is the enemy, they're simply the screenplay writers who have to make it interesting. Perspective is everything.
See, we have a certain idea about people based on the things they most often portray- or in these times most often post.
If you truly get to know someone, you realize they are many layered, usually with interests that span a broad range of things and ideas that can't be neatly tucked into one specific category.
Yet we're being conditioned to believe that's the case. Algorithms are designed to work as if that's the case- Oh, you liked or agreed with that video that has a Christian message? You must be a conservative, church going, prim and proper sort, here are a bunch of videos that will make you gag.
The definition of success for parents is to die before their children. Everything else is just distraction from the phone call they hope they never get.
I got my first smartphone just a handful of months before Cov19 showed up on the scene, so the majority of these thoughts reflect my brain braining- and sometimes not very well- from the rollercoaster of the last couple years. Unlike many, I am not resentful though, nor do I sit and mourn the "good old days".
I've learned quite a bit about people and myself during this period. It's been a time of growth, of death and rebirth. I find that while people can suck, they can also be fantastic, and often it's the same people. We are all on a journey and I truly appreciate walking with people of different perspectives. The differences are what make this strange and beautiful ride an interesting one to be on!