One months gone, and it was like happened yesterday. The bruishes, wounds and scar is still afresh. Till the time, I am outside my home, I feel better and the moment I step in, his absence starts haunting me. Exactly one months ago he left me in front of my eye,and in my arms. It was the sudden sequence of event moment before his last breath that shook me entirely. I was taking picture, making videos with him and in minutes later, I was shocked to see his motionless body lying in front of him.
picture @8.59 AM
Morning Time
11 May' 2023 it was his daughter Birthday. It was a normal begining to the day, after morning routine care of my dad like brushing and tea, I went for shower and then went out around 8 AM seeking some advice from fellow villagers. He was in constant pain, and few village people were asking me to do some rituals from local priest to get rid of his pain and problems.
Night before
My sister called me to know about health condition. She wanted to have a video call, to take his blessing on her birthday. I avoided as I was outside, she asked me to call back after 11 as she was enroute to temple. I returned home around 8.50 AM went straight to him. My wife was prepairing his breakfast. Chapati soaked and diluted in milk. I made him seat with my lap support on his bed. I made few calls, and took some pictures. Usually I never carried phone to him, but that day I sensed some unusual activity. In fact I noticed some strange breathing cycle in him since night. He was breathing profousely and sweating at night. I installed an extra fan for him the night before.
picture @9.00am
Papaaa.....Pappaaa!
He had a back sore so making him seat for while allow him to feel better. He was lying on my lap breathing fast and I kept talking to him (hope he was listening). I was about to feed him. I went to fetch some water to clean his legs making him seat along a stool support. When I get back, in a minute time, his breathing started to slowed down. Soon both his hands stiffen, I made effort to loosen them, and by the moment I realize something fishy he took his last breath in front my eye and in my hand. By the time I laid his body on bed with a sobbing voice calling papa... papa.., my mom already started crying. She noticed he was not breathing anymore.
Valiant effort
I made all my last effort, pumping the heart, rubbing his feet, shouting in his ear, putting neublizor but all efforts went in vain. What suppose to be one of the strongest figure, is lying motionless not even realizing we all are crying for him. By 9.05 AM he was not with us. He asked me not to cry, on his death but my tears didn't stopped flowing. Somehow I controlled myself, and made calls to inform all my family members. Soon the room got filled with grief sorrow pain and uncontrllable crying voices. Everyone is crying, he had been a fatherly figure to all, so his loss meant too much for every relatives / individuals known to him.
Never Before
This was my first experience seeing someone die. Watching him die so closely is very painful. It was hard to realize that someone may leave us in a fraction of seconds. A day before we had a normal talk, a little while ago, he took tea and in a moment he went too far away. I always used to be afraid of not to be with him in his last moment, but now his last moment is not to be erased easily.
final journey
my last 6 years has been fantastic time of my life. By staying close to him gave me immense happiness, something which money can't buy.
I hope, he is listening my voice and visit me someday.