Un día por allá en el 2016, necesitaba ubicar un mecánico urgente, pues el carro que tenía para aquel entonces presentaba fallas y no encontraba a nadie que lograra decirme cuál era el problema. Un vecino me recomienda al “chico de la esquina”, que para los efectos de esta historia llamaremos “el bodrio” (lo siento por el apodo pero es como lo apodamos jaja), un dia lunes, me presento con mi carro donde “el bodrio” intentando saber quién era el chico de la esquina a lo que le pregunto cuando lo veo salir:
Yo: Hola, buen día… disculpa, me dicen que acá vive un muchacho que es mecánico..
El: si, soy yo.
Yo: Bueno quería que revisaras mi carro porque tiene un sonido raro y falla en ciertas ocasiones (explico el problema de mi carrito, él lo revisa)
El: Te espero el sábado en la mañana, me lo traes y reviso bien. (intercambiamos números de contacto)
Yo: perfecto, nos vemos el sábado..
- -LLEGA EL SÁBADO-
Le escribo bien temprano en la mañana y me responde en menos de lo que canta un gallo, me dice que me está esperando desde las 6am… le entrego el carro y me voy a hacer mis cosas. Al final de la tarde me lo entrega, me dice qué hay que hacer y que tan pronto tenga los repuestos se los lleve y el hace el cambio. Voy a buscar mi carro y lo veo tomándose una caja de cervezas, le digo: uy buenísimo para el calor! (amigos, les juro que no era coqueteo ni nada similar, soy muy simpática y a veces hablo de más!) y el me invita a tomarnos una juntos… le digo bueno dale, vengo al rato. Tomando en consideración que vivía a 2 casas de la mía, no le vi problema.. total que nos pusimos a conversar y el tipo super simpático, hablador y hablamos muchísimo, tanto que volví a mi casa a las 2am.
Al día siguiente me estaba mandando mensajes y hablándome y yo le respondía, total que terminamos en una relación y yo ni supe en qué momento pasó.
A veces se quedaba en mi casa o yo en la suya, pero era mas lo que el se venia a mi casa.
Un buen día, estábamos en mi casa viendo películas cuando oímos un golpe super fuerte en la calle... seguido de una mujer gritando el nombre del bodrio. Ese hombre saltó de la cama y se puso pálido en 3 segundos... me dice... "esa es la mamá de mi hijo" y yo: qué mamá? Qué hijo? No me dijiste que tenías un hijo... me dice: te explico todo mañana, voy a resolver esto... la mujer le había roto el vidrio delantero del carro que estaba estacionado frente a su casa, tan duro fue el golpe que se escuchó hasta la mia. Cuando ella lo ve salir de mi casa se acerca hasta la mia con un bebe de 5 meses en brazos... eran mas o menos las 11 de la noche.. el se la llevó casi arrastrada y esa mujer gritaba improperios contra mi a todo volumen. Hizo un escándalo espantoso en toda la cuadra. Yo estaba en shock, ni siquiera alcancé a decirle "loca"...Obviamente esa noche no pegué un ojo. No pude dormir, llena de dudas, rabia, decepción.
Al di siguiente, tal cual lo prometió (creo que fue la única promesa que me cumplió) se apareció en mi casa a darme su super explicación... amigos, ESE era mi momento de huir. De salir corriendo y no mirar a ningún lado... pero ahí me quedé. Me dijo que no se imaginó que nosotros fueramos a tener algo tan lindo en tan corto tiempo... que el pensó que éramos solo un pasatiempo y por eso me ocultó lo del hijo, además de que la mujer habia decidido irse de Valencia y jurado no volver jamás. El no pensó en que ella volvería.. a todo esto, yo le creí y decidí seguir con la relación.
Pasaba el tiempo y todo parecía estar en relativa calma, "la loca" se mantenía tranquila mientras al bebé se le enviara dinero para sus gastos... así que comencé yo misma a ocuparme de eso... Con el bodrio, abrimos un pequeño taller mecánico, el trabajaba y yo lo "administraba", sin embargo, yo tenía mi trabajo estable en la Gobernación del Estado, como abogado, que gracias a Dios jamás dejé por mas que él me insistía en que renunciara porque ganaba poco, porque como todo negocio en Venezuela, era algo inestable, tan pronto dejaba de entrar dinero y no se le podía cumplir con el envío del dinero a la loca, allá se nos presentaba a hacer escándalo.
Teníamos mas o menos 8 meses de relación y yo comienzo a darme cuenta que el bodrio, todos los viernes se iba por ahí a "tomarse unas cervecitas", (fijense lo ciega que yo estaba que no me di cuenta que el tipo siempre había hecho esto, desde que comenzamos) pero ya esto me estaba comenzando a molestar pues no eran 3 y ya, era al menos 1 caja de cerveza, y muchas veces se tomaba hasta el dinero que debía enviar al hijo. Comenzaron los problemas fuertes, pues yo le discutía... si tanto se quejaba de tener problemas con la mamá del bebe, cumple con tu obligación y luego las cervecitas, pero el decía que era lo único que el gastaba para si mismo, pues lo demás era para la casa y para el niño 😒
Para no hacerles el cuento tan largo (porque fueron casi 3 años de relación), comenzamos a tener fuertes discusiones, todo por el licor. Nos separábamos, y al tiempo volvíamos, hasta que un día me dice "estoy cansado de esto, de que terminemos y luego volvamos, yo ya tengo claro que jamas nos vamos a separar por mas peleas que tengamos, no quiero irme mas (porque yo siempre lo corría de la casa jaja) así que me propuso matrimonio y yo ACEPTÉ con la condición de que el dejara de beber y que si lo hacia, yo estuviese con el! Porque amigos, yo tenia marido de lunes a jueves, los fines de semana estaba sola, aburrida y encerrada en mi casa y el llegaba cansado de la borrachera del fin de semana sin ganas de salir ni hacer nada!
Nuestras familias se comenzaron a halar los cabellos, la de el de felicidad, la mía de preocupación. Tomamos una decisión de ese tamaño en cuestión de segundos. Comienzo a preparar todo para el matrimonio, acordamos casarnos por civil y por la iglesia, mas adelante...
Fijamos fecha para el matrimonio: 22 de febrero de 2018. Hicimos todo en secreto, no queríamos que la mamá del bebe se enterara y se nos apareciera allá cual novela mexicana ¡YO ME OPONGO! Me endeudé mal para comprarme un vestido lindo para mi boda, PARA NADA!! jaja 10 dias antes del matrimonio tuvimos la pelea del siglo y todo al carajo amigos!
Viernes, 5pm, lo llamo y para variar me atendió... me dice que se va a quedar trabajando hasta tarde en un carro que tenia que entregar el domingo mas tardar y que su hermano estaba con el ayudándolo.. que mas tardar a las 7pm estaba en casa... listo, le digo... hago cena y dile a tu hermano que venga y hagamos algo los 3. chevere...
Pasaron las horas.. 7... 8... 9!! lo llamo, no me responde... Dios mio, qué angustia! 9.30 se aparece ese hombre como una fiera, super tomado y enojado, pues se había ido a "desestresar" con su hermano en la licorería de la esquina del taller y cuando fue a pagar no encontró su billetera (yo me la había llevado por error dentro de mi cartera) intento calmarlo para explicarle pero no me deja de gritar, no me dejaba hablar, me gritaba cosas horribles, y reaccioné volteándole el hocico de una cachetada.. amigos, ese hombre se puso como un tigre, yo quedé helada... su hermano se lo llevó y hasta ahí quedó todo.. 10 días antes del matrimonio, todo cancelado.
Retomamos contacto un par de días después, el me pidió casarnos pero sin vivir juntos, pero yo lo mandé a freír monos, qué sentido tiene casarte con alguien para vivir separados? Al poco tiempo me enteré que la mamá de su primer hijo estaba nuevamente embarazada de el, y ya estaba avanzada así que obviamente me había sido infiel.
A la fecha, no se donde esta, o si se lo llevó un perro en la boca, o si está viviendo en la calle, me tomó mucho tiempo superar esta relación tan tormentosa, yo realmente quería que esa relación funcionara, quería ayudarlo a dejar el vicio pero aprendí (por las malas) que no se puede ayudar a alguien que no quiere ser ayudado. Aprendí que si no me quiero yo, nadie va a quererme. Si yo no me valoro, nadie va a valorarme.
Tuve muchos problemas después, como les dije todo lo del matrimonio había corrido por mi cuenta, quedé endeudada, me tocó a mi poner la cara frente a ambas familias porque según el fui yo quien canceló el matrimonio.
A quien me lea: no permitan que nadie los pisotee, que nadie los haga sentir menos, no quieran ser salvadores de alguien que no busca ser salvado. Lo mas importante en una relación es la tranquilidad que esa persona pueda brindarte, y busquen ayuda si están en una relación como esta que les relato y no pueden dejarla, por una razón u otra.
Gracias por leerme..
HISTORY IN ENGLISH
Greetings to everyone in this community... the story I come to tell you today, I am ashamed as you can not imagine, I look at it in retrospect and I can not believe how I allowed something like this to happen to me. This is the first time I am going to tell it openly because I am truly ashamed. Even though I grew up a lot after living through all of this....
One day back in 2016, I needed to locate a mechanic urgently, because the car I had at that time was failing and I could not find anyone who could tell me what the problem was. A neighbor recommended me to the "corner boy", who for the purposes of this story we will call "the bodrio" (sorry for the nickname but that's how we nicknamed him haha), one Monday, I show up with my car where "the bodrio" trying to know who was the corner boy to what I ask him when I see him leave:
Me: Hello, good morning... excuse me, they tell me that here lives a guy who is a mechanic....
Him: Yes, that's me.
Me: Well, I wanted you to check my car because it has a strange sound and it fails on certain occasions (I explain the problem with my car, he checks it).
Him: I'll wait for you Saturday morning, bring it to me and I'll check it out (we exchange contact numbers).
Me: perfect, see you Saturday...
- HE ARRIVES ON SATURDAY.
I write him very early in the morning and he answers me in less time than a rooster can crow, he tells me that he is waiting for me since 6am... I give him the car and I go to do my things. At the end of the afternoon he gives it to me, tells me what to do and that as soon as he has the spare parts he will take them to him and he will make the change. I go to get my car and I see him drinking a case of beer, I tell him: great for the heat (friends, I swear it was not flirting or anything like that, I am very nice and sometimes I talk too much!) and he invites me to drink one together... I tell him well come on, I'll come back later. Taking into consideration that he lived 2 houses away from mine, I didn't see a problem... so we started talking and the guy was super nice, talkative and we talked a lot, so much that I went back home at 2am.
The next day he was texting me and talking to me and I was answering him, so we ended up in a relationship and I didn't even know when it happened.
Sometimes he would stay at my house or I would stay at his, but it was more that he would come to my house. One fine day, we were at my house watching movies when we heard a super loud bang in the street... followed by a woman screaming the name of the bodrio. That man jumped out of bed and turned pale in 3 seconds... he says to me..... "that's my son's mom" and me: what mom? What son? You didn't tell me you had a son... he tells me: I'll explain everything tomorrow, I'm going to solve this... the woman had broken the front window of the car that was parked in front of his house, the blow was so hard that it was heard even in my house. When she saw him leave my house she came over to mine with a 5 month old baby in her arms... it was about 11 o'clock at night... he took her almost dragged away and that woman was shouting expletives against me at full volume. She made a terrible racket in the whole block. I was in shock, I didn't even manage to say "crazy" to her... Obviously that night I didn't sleep a wink. I couldn't sleep, full of doubts, anger, disappointment.
The next day, just as he promised (I think it was the only promise he kept) he showed up at my house to give me his super explanation... friends, THAT was my time to run away. To run away and not look anywhere... but that's where I stood. He told me that he didn't imagine that we were going to have something so nice in such a short time... that he thought we were just a hobby and that's why he hid the child from me, besides the fact that the woman had decided to leave Valencia and swore never to come back. He didn't think that she would come back... but I believed him and decided to continue with the relationship.
Time went by and everything seemed to be relatively calm, "la loca" stayed calm as long as the baby was sent money for her expenses... so I started to take care of that myself.... With the bodrio, we opened a small mechanic shop, he worked and I "managed" it, however, I had my stable job in the State Government, as a lawyer, which thank God I never left even though he insisted that I quit because I earned little, because like any business in Venezuela, it was somewhat unstable, as soon as the money stopped coming in and the money could not be sent to the crazy woman, she would show up there to make a fuss.
We had been in a relationship for about 8 months and I began to realize that the bodrio, every Friday he went out there to "have a few beers", (look how blind I was that I did not realize that the guy had always done this, since we started) but this was starting to bother me because it was not 3 and already, it was at least 1 case of beer, and many times he even took the money he had to send to his son. The strong problems began, because I argued with him... if he complained so much about having problems with the baby's mother, fulfill your obligation and then the beers, but he said that it was the only thing he spent for himself, because the rest was for the house and for the child 😒.
To make a long story short (because it was almost 3 years of relationship), we began to have strong arguments, all because of the liquor. We would separate, and after a while we would come back, until one day he told me "I'm tired of this, of us breaking up and then coming back, I already know that we will never separate no matter how many fights we have, I don't want to leave anymore (because I would always run him out of the house haha) so he proposed marriage and I AGREED on the condition that he would stop drinking and that if he did, I would be with him! Because friends, I had a husband from Monday to Thursday, on weekends I was alone, bored and locked in my house and he came home tired from the weekend drunk and didn't feel like going out or doing anything!
Our families began to pull each other's hair out, his with happiness, mine with worry. We made a decision that big in a matter of seconds. I started to prepare everything for the marriage, we agreed to get married in a civil ceremony and in a church, later on...
We set a date for the marriage: February 22, 2018. We did everything in secret, we didn't want the baby's mom to find out and show up there like a Mexican novela ¡YO ME OPPOSE! I got into debt to buy a nice dress for my wedding, NOT AT ALL!!! haha 10 days before the wedding we had the fight of the century and everything to hell friends!
Friday, 5pm, I call him and for a change he picked up.... he tells me that he is going to stay late working on a car he had to deliver on Sunday at the latest and that his brother was with him helping him... that he would be home by 7pm at the latest... ready, I tell him... I make dinner and tell your brother to come and we can do something together... nice...
Hours passed... 7... 8... 9!!! I call him, he doesn't answer me... My God, what anguish! 9.30 that man appears like a beast, super drunk and angry, because he had gone to "de-stress" with his brother in the liquor store on the corner of the workshop and when he went to pay he did not find his wallet (I had taken it by mistake in my wallet) I tried to calm him down to explain but he would not stop yelling at me, he would not let me talk, he yelled horrible things, and I reacted by slapping him in the face with a slap. . friends, that man became like a tiger, I froze... his brother took him away and that was it.... 10 days before the wedding, everything was cancelled.
We got back in touch a couple of days later, he asked me to marry him but without living together, but I sent him to fry monkeys, what's the point of marrying someone to live apart? Soon after I found out that the mother of his first child was pregnant again, and she was already advanced, so obviously he had been unfaithful to me.
To date, I don't know where he is, or if he was taken by a dog in his mouth, or if he is living on the street, it took me a long time to get over this stormy relationship, I really wanted this relationship to work, I wanted to help him quit the vice but I learned (the hard way) that you can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped. I learned that if I don't love myself, no one will love me. If I don't value myself, no one will value me.
I had a lot of problems afterwards, as I told you everything about the marriage was on my account, I was in debt, it was up to me to face both families because according to him it was me who cancelled the marriage.
To whoever reads me: do not allow anyone to trample on you, do not let anyone make you feel less, do not want to be the savior of someone who is not looking to be saved. The most important thing in a relationship is the peace of mind that person can give you, and seek help if you are in a relationship like the one I am telling you about and can't leave it, for one reason or another.
Thank you for reading me.
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Fotografía de mi propiedad