I have been made to understand that there can be an exception to things and people, but it took me having the experience to realize that I could think such a way. So, a few years back, there was this particular incident that was making waves all over the internet and even the mouths of people. I for one, just read the hot takes people had to say about the incident and listened to what they said but didn't agree with what they were saying because I believed that such an incident could never take place around me. I mean, before I had to come to such a conclusion, it meant that I knew myself, my surroundings, and the people around me and trusted myself, my surroundings, and the people around me.
The incident was about friends poisoning friends, and the negative things happening due to having and trusting friends. Like a girlfriend being jealous and poisoning her friend because she was jealous of her best friend's success, and the rest we can think about. Many couldn't help but talk about and express their displeasure and contempt about having and trusting friends and while I understood their point of view, because of course, I have had a share of friendships gone sour, I just could not relate to the the instances they were giving.
Tell me why I call someone a "friend" or "best friend" but can not feel safe around such a person, why would I be walking with someone but can not eat or get a drink from the person because I do not trust the person, why can't I feel or think that my opened drink is safe with the person I call my friend, you know this instances they gave and more just couldn't make sense to me.
It would be a hurting thing to know or realize that the person I call my "best friend" or see as a friend isn't safe with having her food or drink lay around me carelessly, it would be disappointing to call someone my friend but I am afraid of the harm the person could do to me. I know the world is becoming something else, but what is the need to have someone or call someone a friend when you live in fear around the person? Why add such a burden upon yourself when you could just let go of such friendship and get something better and worth it?
The world is already too hard on its own, so being with or in a cycle of friends where you have to question everything they say or do because you do not trust them or because you are afraid of them harming you is what I don't understand, calling people who we can not leave or food or drink around them "friends" or "best friend" is the height of hypocrisy and harm we are doing to ourselves and constantly living in fear around those people is more dangerous than the illness.
But then, I kinda question the thought pattern of humans, we are always quick to say "I can not keep friends", "I do not have friends" "I can not trust friends", or "Friends are not to be trusted" yediyediyada all because we've heard others' experiences, but has the experiences of those who were maimed by their spouses stop us from getting married? Why do we and why are we ready to get married which of course is a risk, but not ready to make friends which is also a risk. Why are we fast to think that friends could kill but not fast to think that spouses could kill as well? We are quick to go with the tag "I don't have friends" but look for people when we need help and expect them to see us as friends.
I have friends but I just can not imagine myself living in fear around those people, I just can not imagine them as well living in fear around me, I live in my friend's house, and most days, if I am out, they cook before I am back and I just eat, most days we go out and I get distracted while my drink is on the table opened and I am not afraid of getting poisoned by my friends and this goes both ways. I say these "Once you realize that I am a threat to you or once you realize that I am an enemy, walk away from me, and here I will do the same but for once I never thought that I would come to the point of thinking that way about someone.
I have talked about letting go of a particular friendship because of a hurting statement said to me, and I do not regret that we went our separate ways, even though we can be termed acquaintances from a distance, it does not mean I take the other person as an enemy or a threat. If anything brings us together, we would still treat each other with respect and I would never see that person as an enemy or threat to be afraid of my life around, regardless of what was said to me.
All these while I have always thought I would never have any reason to think that way not until recently an incident happened, and for the first time, I saw myself afraid for my life, I saw the person as a threat to my life and I had no option but to take the next available flight out of such person's life.
This is my entry to Hive Naija Weekly Prompt | Edition 80