Two simple words, but behind them lie a thousand untold stories.....Before and after. I was just starting my life, and I wasn't prepare for it, they just barge in, and they happen to really interrupt my life, my timing and my plans.
I was in my second year in the higher institution, it was a polytechnic, you have to run a two years course and be awarded an ND degree(National Diploma), after which you are mandated to go for a 1 year IT(Industrial Training), and then you either cross over to a university or go back to a polytechnic for continuation, run another 2 years and be awarded an HND Degree(Higher National Diploma) making a total of 5 years.
Then, during my ND, I was so focused, determined, and full of drive. I was the typical hardworking guy, always busy, and also doing all sort of things to survive. But all of that paused when my body started telling a story I wasn’t prepared to hear.
It began with discomfort, I bought some pills, but the pain wouldn’t go away, when the pain feels unbearable, I had to visit the hospital afywr which I was referred to a general hospital in my state, as at then also, they were on strike, I was taken back to the private hospital where I was being managed, few days later, they called of the strike and I went back to the general hospital, there I was diagnosed with Hirschsprung disease. I had never heard of it before, but it changed my life completely.
I was in my 2nd year of my ND, and it was around the holiday period, I was in the hospital up until we resumed, during that time, I got operated on, before that, we were even told such surgery has never been done in Nigeria, what, am I being an experiment and all, well we were told to not fear, we had to sign various consent forms so as to go ahead with the surgery, we did and the first surgery was performed, I had been briefed on what to expect and how I was expected to start living for the next few months after the operation.
I came out of the theater room with a colostomy, I wouldn't be able to excrete via my anus for the next few months, I had to be going about with a colostomy bag on my stomach, which needs to be changed regularly, also this waste is not the controllable type, it comes anytime, it wasn't an easy phase in my life, I wanted to drop out of school, but I decided not to, it wasn't a easy decision to make, I would be among students with that, even though it won't be outside, its coverable by cloth, but still. The word limit wouldn't allow me to expatiate more on how living with such is.
I managed to finish my ND program, all thanks to God, my families and friend's, they stood by me through it all, I saw a lot, but all thanks to God, after about 4-5 month's we were told reversal would be done, I was so happy, I went in for another operation, but then again, it couldn't be reversed, I came out again with an ileostomy, I was told its much more better compared to a colostomy, but that's not for me, this was worse, the flow was just to much, the nags I use was usually ordered from abroad, it was draining is financially.
First came the colostomy, then the ileostomy, my life transformed into hospital beds, tubes, medications, injections, drugs and adjusting to living with a stoma bag. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever experienced. I changed, I became withdrawn, and I faced the kind of loneliness that even noise couldn’t fill. The boy who was so full of energy suddenly needed help to do the simplest things, I missed myself, and I missed life.
My time for 1 year IT passed, I was supposed to put in for HND, I couldn't, I was still battling with my life then, my studies was on hold, 2years gone again in this illness, it was during those painful, quiet and lonely moments that I was introduced to hive. I love writing a lot even before all this started, I was the type who has this free flow of words, just let me have a pen or open my note app on my phone, inspiration would start coming in, by brother @vickoly saw this and decided to put me through, that was how I started, I joined the platform not just as a way to pass time, but as a way to breathe.
Hive became my outlet, my safe space. I started sharing bits of my journey, one so raw, real, and sometimes messy, ones I couldn't summon the courage to share via speech, and through that, I started feeling again. It helped me put words to the storm that was happening inside me. Through @hive, I met people who saw me beyond my illness, people encouraged me, prayed for me, shared their own stories, and reminded me that I wasn’t alone and that it's just a phase I would definitely overcome. Hive became more than a platform. It became a place where my voice mattered.
And little by little, I began using my story to inspire others, not just on hive, even on my WhatsApp status, I shared messages of hope, faith, and resilience. I spoke openly about what it means to hurt but still heal, to fall but still rise. And the more I shared, the more people reached out to say thank you, your story gave me strength. And that was how I started finding purpose.
After few months, all thanks to God, the ileostomy was reversed and it was a success, I couldn't continue with my handwork (tiling) I took my time to rest for another year and then I finally returned to school, and was also learning how to make various type of frames(see first image), I ran my two years HND program, it wasn’t easy, but I was stronger. I graduated last year, and it felt like more than just a degree, it was victory over everything that tried to stop me. Need I tell you that I didn't stop there, I shared my story the more, now I have overcame, who say's you also can't, might not be an health related issue, I went through a lot I couldn't possibly out into words, battling with illness for years, is it the money, the time, the stress, the pain and all, what exactly should I talk about, but God was and is faithful.
Every day, on my WhatsApp status, I post short messages, sometimes reflections, sometimes prayers, sometimes simple reminders that healing is possible and God is still good, and on weekends I do anonymous for those who want to share anything anonymously, and sincerely, it was great. People message me, people share stuff with me privately, they open up, and thank me, telling me how much the words helped them hold on just a little longer.
And that’s the beauty of after, it doesn’t need to look like what we expected, but sometimes it’s better. I’ve touched lives, given hope, and reminded people that their pain and struggles doesn’t disqualify them from purpose. Most importantly, I’ve shown that there’s nothing God cannot do, I’m a living proof, a testament that when life stops you, it’s not always the end, it might just be the beginning of something new and divine.
Now, I can say I’m living, before, I was doing things because I could, now I’m doing them because they matter. Before, I kept quiet when I was hurting and in pain, but now I speak up because someone, somewhere needs to know they’re not alone.
Sincerely, its beyond this, the journey was hard, rough and all, there were tears, up to 6 different surgeries, sleepless nights, and moments I wanted to give up. But today, I’m thankful, I'm thankful because I survived and because my survival gave others a reason to believe and hold on again. I myself am a testimony, my scars are no more symbols of pain, they are reminders of grace, and my life has become a story, one where I will always find something to share and say until the day someone reads it and decides not to give up.
And here is my before and after. Through it all, I’ve learned that with God, you can still shine and rise again, and that purpose sometimes hides in pain, just don't give up, you will have a story to tell.
All pictures are mine.
My sincere apologies if my words were above the maximum
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