It only takes a moment to say something that could take you years to fix! It is best to take a deep breath in heated moments and consider if YOU want to say something or your feelings do! Do you find breathing "in and out" before making some kind of speech hilarious? Talking from my experience, you may consider taking some breaths in certain situations before speaking, as the time you take to do the breathing helps you calm down before you take rash decisions or actions. Remember, spoken words cannot be retrieved!
There are some words we say to people that are capable of leaving a permanent scar in their hearts, and that moment might never be forgotten. Our tongue is capable of making us lose the trust people have in us, and that's why guarding our tongue remains vital. I understand that we are humans with emotions; there are things that will happen and we lose it completely, saying what ordinarily we ought not to say if we are in our right frame of mind. This mostly leads to regrets!
I have been in a situation where I said something that I instantly wished I could take back the moment I said it, but unfortunately, I couldn't retrieve that word. Talking about this now just reminded me how foolish I was, but the most important thing is that I learned my lesson and have improved since the encounter.
That faithful day, my son returned from school with a high temperature. I quickly checked with my thermometer, and it was reading (39°C), that was too high ! I quickly reached out to my husband, but he didn't pick his calls. I ordered for a ride via online so fast, and within some minutes, we were in the hospital. Immediately the nurses checked his vitals; they screamed and started attending to him immediately. They did a lot to calm the temperature down to avoid leading to a convulsion. Still in the hospital, I called my husband again, and he didn't pick; that was unlike him. Then I dropped a text to him on Whatsapp, still no response. I was still calm, and my major concern was the health of my child at that time. After like 3 hours, my child became better, and we were asked to go home.
Around 7 a.m., hubby called and asked if the kids beverages had finished so he could buy another at the mall while coming back. Hmmm., Immediately I heard such a statement, I didn't bother replying to him but hung the phone on him. I mean, what nonsense beverage is more important than the health of our child? Why can't he ask me about my calls and messages? Could it be that he didn't see my calls and messages? No, I concluded that he saw it but was acting up. I was furious and waiting for his return. When he eventually returned, I was extremely angry, and I decided not to say a word at that time because it would be terrible. Hubby didn't even understand my reasons for keeping quiet on him; he was just staying in his lane because my mood was unapproachable that night.
Early in the morning, the plan was to sit him down and ask why he claimed not to see my calls and texts and resolve the issue amicably, but unfortunately, it didn't happen that way. Hubby met me in the kitchen and asked why I didn't wear the boy reasonable clothes while the weather was a bit cold. Immediately, I responded, "I am highly disappointed in you!" How can I wear him reasonable cloth with such high temperature? He was confused by my response, and I began raising my voice, expressing how disappointed I am in him. It was a terrible morning that day. He wept at that statement and asked why I said that to him.
My angry spirit didn't care until I really understood what transpired around him the same time I was in the hospital with my son. He asked me several questions about how we have been leaving together for years and his commitment over the kids. I was speechless and so ashamed of my speech. It was then that I took a deep breath and reflected on everything and later realized that indeed, he doesn't deserve such a statement. I didn't know where to start apologizing from, but I had to. It was difficult for him to believe that I could use such a word on him, but my emotions clouded my sense of reasoning. I kneeled down and sincerely apologized to him, and he forgave me.
Ever Since that encounter, I have learned not to open my mouth and say something that would hurt someone's feelings or make them sad but to really think through the situation before speaking, as we can never retrieve a spoken word.
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Image 1,2,& 3 were taken from canva