It's already 2024, almost 2025, the year has been good, bad, sweet - sour, and running to its close.
Many events has happened throughout, I've laughed, been sober, cried out loud uncontrollably, but then, I'm till kicking. Hardship ups and downs, but when I look back at where I started, all I can say is; thanks be to Jehovah for preserving this fragile life of mine that he gave me the grace to claim.
We all hope to blow up, forget those sad days and look into the future in hopes of a bright and beautiful future. "Some thing we all adore, is the one thing worth dieing for, but then, the process of getting it is filled with nothing but pain, we are stuck in this game, all in the name of searching for Fortune and fame." ~ 2Pac
But then, when we look into the past, we see nothing but struggles, the struggles and tears of our younger self, the hopes he or she had that we will be what we are or more than what we are today. Plans were made, but one thing or the other spoilt those plans. Countless times, we had to go back to square zero just to start all over again. Damn, looking at my past self, I can proudly say that I am making my dreams come true.
There are a whole lot of things I would like to tell my younger self. Both for the mistakes I made, for the the success I achieved, and for the things I failed to do out of fear. I guess I'll have to save this post's link for my future self.
TO MY PAST SELF
Hey kiddo, I know you worked your ass out trying to make plans for me and our future self. I know how hard it was for you. You left home to start a new, mom and dad was worried but you calmed their worries. It was a good one, I'm proud of the decision you took and I will support you to make that same decision any day and time irrespective of the fact that the decision caused us a whole lot of pain and suffering at the initial phase. You're strong ya'know.
That step you took actually made us who we are today. The decisions you helped us take were top notch. You're brave, courageous and fearless and I'm proud of it. You made some mistakes, yes, I still can't get it off of my chest, but then, it is what it is. He tried all he could to reach out to you, even though he was not directly related to you, he wanted you to be a part of him, but then, welp, you refused. Now he's dead, and that your decision left me with regret. Hmm.. tsk... Welp, It is what it is. RIP
I got what you wanted me to get, I am currently working on the house project we talked about, and guess what? I've almost finished the roof. I've not been able to buy the assets you wanted me to buy, but then, 2025 will be a good year and I'll be sure to do them.
Yes, I became a nurse. I can see the pride in your eyes. That smile in your face is making me want to do more. I'm working my ass out and trying to get different source of passive income. It's hard, I didn't know it will be this hard, but then, I am making it gradually. I even forgot to get us a present on our birthday this year. Tsk.... So much for this difficult plans of yours.
Remember Reina? Yes, her, welp, we broke up, haha. She messed up, and I had to let go. I wouldn't say I'm totally happy.
We used to be cold but I became colder, and more realistic in terms of love. I'm glad and I'm motivated. Motivated to bag more.
Mom is fine. She missed you a lot. She says she wants her baby back but then, that baby has grown into what he is today. Always reminding me of the good times she had with you. Just as you wanted, mom is currently eating our money, though not much, yet, it's something. I'm glad that I could send her some cash even though she don't need it.
You tried kiddo, your insights were really good and I trust you a lot. You led us even when you were young. Kudos. I wish I could have a drink with you, to tell you many more in person.
Even though you are my past, not actually dead per-se, I love you kiddo. You tried.