Lately, I have come to realise that if there is one thing that I seriously need to let go of, that will be the past, you see it's not just any past o, I mean the one that still sits in the corner of my heart and mind like it is paying rent, It is hard to admit this, but it has been holding me back, making me question myself so much, and honestly it has been wasting the energy I could be using to move forward.
I have gone through a lot emotionally so much ,especially in the last few months, Some days I sit and think about how certain things have played out , how some people treated me, the mistakes I have made, the times I stayed silent when I should have spoken up, or gave chances when I should have walked away , all these thoughts just sit in my head now p laying like one long movie I did not even want to watch.
There are moments when I just feel like I have moved on, then boom..... one little thing will now trigger those memories and everything just all comes rushing back like it never even left,that is the thing hing about the past, yeah..... If you don’t intentionally let go of it, it will always find a way to sneak back into your present.
See I will not lie, it has not been easy, I have had to remind myself daily that I am not the same person I was back then, that experience has really shaped me, yes, but it does not define me I have learned that holding on to pain, regret, or even guilt won’t change what happened,it only keeps me stuck while life is moving on without me.
There is a lot I want to achieve, a lot I want to become, and I know I can’t do that if I keep dragging the weight of what I have already been through, Sometimes growth just means having to release, even if your hands are shaking while doing it.
So I have started small, Writing out my feelings instead of bottling them, talking to people I trust when it gets too heavy,saying prayers that focus more on healing than revenge or answers,most importantly, I am. giving myself grace, because letting go is not a switch you flip , it is a process.
I believe letting go of the past doesn’t mean forgetting it, It means not letting it have power over your present. I am learning to take the lessons and leave the pain behind ,Because I deserve to move forward without the weight of what I have already survived.
One day at a time, I am choosing peace over pain, you see I am choosing healing over replaying old scenes ,and somehow, I feel lighter already.
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