You ever just sit down and think about how much you’ve changed over the years? Like, one minute, you're on your laptop sorting the most serious business, and the next, nostalgia hits you alongside some sprinkle of past memories. if you could time-travel and have a conversation with your younger self, would past you even recognize who you are today? Because same! I never would have thought I'd undergo so many self-awareness in my journey towards self-love.
And quite honestly, It's made me lose some and gain some.
When I was younger, I saw the world in a very “this-or-that” manner. Life was supposed to either black or white, yin or yang. People were supposed to be either villain or hero. You were either nice or mean, right or wrong, with me or against me. Life seemed simple. But growing up has shown me that most things exist in that messy, chaotic gray area. People are complex, emotions are layered. No one is purely good or evil; and sometimes, things don’t make sense no matter how hard you try to figure them out. And let’s not even talk about how adulthood just hits you one day like a bag of rice, and all you can think is, "Wetin be this, no be the adulthood dem promise me be this oh". It just makes you question everything you once believed in.
Before, I’d take things so personally, like if a friend ghosted me or someone didn’t reciprocate the same energy, I’d overanalyze it. Now? I just think, they’re going through something, me sev I'm going through something lol; or maybe they don’t have the capacity for me right now, and that’s okay. Growth.
Speaking of growth, let’s talk about dumb decisions. Specifically, the craziest thing I’ve ever done on a dare. Because if there’s one thing younger me didn’t have, it was shame. Chai!
So, it was a regular evening, one that still haunts me by the way, I’m younger, full of vibrant foolishness, and surrounded by friends who, at the time, I thought were the coolest people alive, we were THE SQUAD. One random evening, we’re playing truth or dare, classic recipe for disaster. I had gotten away with picking truth a little too many times, and my friends were not having it.
“Nahhh, you can’t keep choosing truth. You have to pick dare.”
And me, being young and allergic to being called boring, said, “okay. Dare.”
Worst. Decision. Of. My. Life.
I was dared to walk up to a very good-looking stranger, hit them with the cheesiest pickup line ever, and then pretend to faint dramatically in their arms. Sounds simple right? I promise you, doing this in public, in a space full of friends, enemies and strangers? It wasn't funny at the time.
Now, my pride should have stopped me, but did it? No. Instead, I walked up to this random, unsuspecting human who, by the way, looked like they had zero time for my nonsense and I confidently said,
"Are you French? Because Eiffel for you." (Arghhghhhh, CRINGE!)
And then, as if that wasn't enough, I collapsed.
Let me tell you something, I wasn't expecting a prince charming catches the princess scene, but even though! Because instead of catching me, instead of laughing or playing along, this person hissed and moved out of the way.
Yes. They sidestepped my entire existence.
And just like that, I hit the cold, unforgiving floor. HARD.
I have never felt humiliation like that in my entire life. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me whole. My soul left my body for three business days. 😭
Looking back, I laugh so hard at moments like these. Because, would I ever do something that embarrassing again? Absolutely not. But am I glad I did? Weirdly, yes. But, since that day, I developed an hatred for truth & dare. Who even plays T & D anyways, it's so boring (no, this is not me being bitter).
At the end of the day, that’s what I’ve realized as I’ve gotten older, life just like this article, isn’t meant to be taken so seriously. The embarrassing moments, the cringey decisions, the absolute madness? It’s all part of the ride.
So, why don't we enjoy it while it lasts?
NAIJA DICTIONARY
- Wetin be this : what is this
- No be the adulthood dem promise me be this oh : this isn't the adulthood I was promised
- Me sev : even I
- Chai : (exclamation such as OMG)
All images are mine.
Thank you for reading! :)