Someone To Rely On | Mixed Media Project

To be able to know without a doubt that you can count on another person or persons to come to your aid whenever you request is without hesitation is a beautiful feeling. That's the feeling I wanted to portray in this piece I titled "Someone To Rely On".

I've often witnessed people who refer to others as their "best friend forever" in modern terminology when speaking of someone close.

But first, what is a friend?

A true friend is someone who genuinely likes you for yourself and no other self reason or benefit you may provide to that other person. Someone who provides unconditional support, loyalty, and honesty. It is someone who stands by your side through life’s challenges. That person is someone who has shared values and respect for you. The person is also respected by others, is dependable, trustworthy himself or herself, and caring, offering empathy and understanding through both good and bad difficulties. ¹

I will add that, in my opinion, a true friend is someone you feel safe with that don't engage in kibbing.

Numerous benefits exists in a close friend relationship that I personally have been the beneficiary of. You may not know it, but according to The Mayo Clinic in its Adult Heath series, friendships can have an enormous positive effect on your health and well-being. But also, according to the clinic, knowing this and accomplishing it is difficult to achieve for some individuals.<sup2

Here are the benefits of having a true friend. Friends can:

• Help you celebrate good times and support you during bad times;

• Help keep you from feeling alone;

• Raise your sense of connection, belonging and purpose;

• Boost your happiness and lower your stress;

• Improve your self-confidence and feelings of self-worth;

• Help you cope through hard times, such as divorce, serious illness, job loss or the death of a loved one; and

• Urge you to change or avoid habits that aren't healthy. These might include drinking too much or not exercising enough to upkeep your overall health. ²

If friendship is the most important relationship in a human's life, even more so than romantic or other types, then why don't more people profess to having a true friend or being one?

The answer may lie in the fact that often individuals are unaware of the importance, or they lack the necessary skills to find a friend or become one. People may have pressures in your own life that require your full attention at any given phase of your life and just don't have time to spare.

Work or caring for family, such as children or aging parents might preclude you from having available time to make and support friends. Usually a person and his or her friend or friends may have grown apart due to changes in their lives or interests. Often, people move away and fail to keep in touch.

This scenario happened to me with several friends when the company in which we were employed in late 1990s relocated to California, and some employees elected to move to the new state. My position wasn't high enough in the organization for the company to offer and for me to make that move. We kept in touch for a while, then the relationship slowly faded.

For those of you who don't possess the skills to attract a friend and nurture a relationship that develops into one that could be classified as a "best friend", some suggestions I discovered may assist in this effort.

First we must acknowledge that making and keeping good friends takes effort. And, just like any other relationship, it requires continuous nurturing.

Several avenues exist that you can pursue in your efforts to make friends.

• Social network. Think about people you've talked with, even just a little, who you liked and whose company you enjoyed. However, when it comes to "social" online presence, one has to be careful. Not everyone you meet online is genuine and may not be who they portray.

• If you're considering someone you'd like to know better, reach out. It's the first step and often the most difficult. But it might be easier to make than you realize. Inquire of others who know both of you to put you in touch if they feel you might be a good match with your personalities. Next, follow up with a text, email, phone call, or visit. Invite the person to dine in a friendly setting.

• Go to places where people gather. Near me is a community center for senior citizens. There we meet individuals who may live in other subdivision but want to explore the activities the center offer on scheduled day or special events.

• Use more than one way to meet others. some places include searching using terms such as [your city] + social network, or neighborhood events. Consider groups or clubs that gather around an interest or hobby that can be located online, in the newspaper, or on local message boards. Websites exist that help connect with people in your area.

• Volunteer. Offer your time or talents at a hospital, place of worship, museum, community center, charity or something similar. You can form strong links when you work with people who have interests like yours.

• Give and accept invitations. Invite a friend to join you for coffee or lunch. When you're invited to a social event, say yes. Then return the invitation.

• Take up a new interest. Take a college or community education course to meet people who have interests like yours. Join a class at a local gym, senior center or community fitness center.

• Join a faith community. Then go to the community's hosted special activities and get-to-know-you events for new members.

• Always be mindful of people you meet on the streets. However, taking a walk is advisable. Chat with others you see along the way. Or go to a popular park and talk to people there.²

All this advice I've read about can only work if you have time in your life to devote to it. Please don't force yourself to make friends if you don't have time or are not in a positive frame of mind. Often we want friends in our lives, but are not in a right frame of mind.

Sometimes meeting this new people can assist us in our problems or can suggest avenues we may not have considered. That indeed is a true friend when you find that person.

It is advised to calm yourself. If you're nervous or shy about meeting new people like I am, you may be tempted to stay home. Fear of rejection may be one the causes for this. Use deep breathing, yoga or other mind-body techniques to help you relax.

It's suggested that the more you try, the easier it becomes. And the more you're likely to succeed. Continuing the search also matters. Reach out instead of waiting for others to come to you. You may need to suggest plans a few times before you can tell if a new person desires to reciprocate.²

Once you make new friends, remember it's advisable to nourish those friendships by doing the following:

Stay in touch with people with whom you've worked with or met if possible.
Get back in touch with old friends.
Reach out to people you've met and enjoyed at social events if you have their contact information.
Meet new neighbors.
Make time to reconnect with family members you want to be close to.

It is recommended that above all, you must remain positive. You may not become friends with everyone you meet. But being positive and reaching out can help make the relationships you have better. It also may help you make friends with people you meet.

Are you a good friend, or do you have one in your life?

To illustrate the bond of friendship, I designed a mixed media art project. I depicted the concept of friendship in a piece featuring two females. Below are my steps in which I uploaded the images into Canva, my design program to blend. I leave with you my procedures which began with a blank, white canvas. I then added layers of elements using tools to remove backgrounds, detach elements from their backgrounds, colorize, resize, filter, duplicate, and reposition items.

The images I included are listed below. Two of the images I retrieved from the stable diffusion program, StarryAI.

Textured background ~ Two females ~ Abstract pattern ~ Colorful ring ~ Teardrop - StarryAi ~ Psychedelic Flowers-Image3 - StarryAI.