This dish is the result of an evening of cooking where almost everything that could go wrong did go wrong. I gave up on taking pictures about halfway through, so there'll be no recipe to follow. Sorry.
I started with toasting some szechuan peppers in the wok, and set them aside in the mortar to crush them. Then I made the sauce from the Chinese Kale recipe by @anggreklestari , but added a few dried chilies to make it hotter, and used cilantro stalks instead of spring onion, since that's what was available. After that I sliced garlic and onion and put in the wok to fry until crispy.
 |  |  |
|---|
In the meantime I made a marinade for the chicken hearts, and this is where things started to go bad. While I was trying to take a picture of the marinade, moving the bowl around to avoid only seeing a reflection of the ceiling lamp, all the lovely garlic turned coal black! I had accidentally turned the heat all the way up, though I could swear I had it on medium-low.
I didn't have any more garlic, so I couldn't start over. Instead I turned the oven on, so I could grill my skewers once I had made them. Then the second mistake was discovered. I had forgotten to put the szechuan pepper in the marinade, and didn't notice until too late. I guess I could have sprinkled the pepper on afterwards, but I like to soften the ground pepper a little by letting it soak in the marinade.
Problem #3 quickly popped up. Some time this summer, after one BBQ or another, apparently I forgot to put all the skewers back in the drawer where they belong. I could only find 4, but I am sure there should be 12. Ok, so 4 skewers were made, and the rest of the hearts were simply fried while the "real food" went into the oven for about 15 minutes. Finally dinner-time, and the rice cooker lit up its ready-light just when I wanted it!
Even though I knew I wouldn't be able to post a recipe, I decided to plate the food properly and take a picture before eating. And it looks a lot better than it tasted, because - fourth disaster - I had forgotten to add anything salty to the marinade. It was easy to fix, of course, but still not quite a happy ending after all that work.
To console myself, I'm making pulled beef today. But that won't turn into a recipe post either, because I have forgotten been too lazy to delete old photos, so now there's no room for new ones until I do that.
Things can't get worse now, can they? No, I'll do better tomorrow! Am I not right, @bradleyarrow ?