Years ago my family and I lived the experience of living with an uncle who had paranoid schizophrenia problems, the experiences are very strong, one on the part of Him who had to live that stormy disease that causes them to see hallucinations, they despair, they scream, they cry, they live anxiously and in the moments when their brain chemicals are stable this allows them to think and reason, in the case of my uncle he became sad and wondered crying Why is this happening to me if I am not bad? And that saddened me even more. I couldn't give him that answer since I asked myself that question and I STILL DON'T KNOW.

Grow up with Mom and Dad! This is something that NEVER happened, and I have asked myself: What would my life have been like if I had been raised with Mama and Papa? What significant changes would exist in my life?

My parents separated when I was two years old and my memories are null, as adults they made that decision but as many couples do not think about the future consequences that impact the lives of children growing up in a dysfunctional home, THEY ARE MANY, especially in the emotional part; From here arises until the bullying of Father's Day for mentioning something very basic and not delving into this ocean of sensations, All with their parents and mine never was, the advice of a father in adolescence is essential for a woman and He never He was there. For this and millions of other things I have always asked myself this question.

What would my life be like if I were married to my boyfriend at 18?

Yes! Sometimes I ask myself this, not because I miss him or even love him, just because of the fact that after the age of 21 and until two years ago I began to suffer from blood flow problems that affected my health significantly to such a level that for medical reasons I had to have a Hysterectomy and I have no children and I will not be able to have them either. Well summed up! It is definitely the only reason why I wonder since I think that possibly between my 18 and 21 years I could have gotten pregnant. But who knows? I do not know!.

The million questions come after having undergone that surgery, because every woman wants to have children and live the experience of being a mother and I am not the exception, I also wanted to have a version of me in male or female replica and I say to myself:

How is a pregnancy? That thing about the kicks and the beat of your heart in an echo?
What was my son like? What was Mama's princess like?
How does it feel to give birth to a child? How does it feel to breastfeed a child?
What a beautiful feeling is that of coming home exhausted from work and your son saying I LOVE YOU MOM and taking everything away from you? In short, there are so many things that are triggered from there that I will never know even before I die but I thank God infinitely for allowing me to live.

Yes! Many times when we ask many questions it seems that we deny many things or feel unhappy about the life we ​​have lived, personally I am very grateful to God for allowing me to live, with all the positive and negative things that have happened to my life already that this has allowed me to form what I am today.

To finish the answer to this question I want to share with you some of what I use to give me encouragement day by day since in life we ​​receive the good and the bad, it depends on our attitude and aptitude to improve the perspective to keep ourselves emotionally balanced:

"There are gray days and days of multiple colors."
“Flowers are beautiful, but they have thorns. Is that why they stop being beautiful? Not!"
“When you ride a roller coaster you enjoy the curves, the climbs and the descents, this is life, you have to appreciate when we are good (above), when we are bad (below) and even those sudden breaking points that surprise us like the Roller Coaster Curves”