In response to @kenechukwu97 dreemport challenge for this week. No one is perfect, this is the first thing we have to understand as human beings, and our imperfections made us learn from whoever we meet in the journey of life. Finding a way to live in peace with others is one way to avoid unnecessary dramas because as expected, some humans possesses animalistic behavior that might not go well with other people but how can one relate in peace with such people?. One thing I have learnt from my father is "treating people according to their peculiarity, once you know how to relate with people based on who they are and not trying to change them for any reason then there will be peace.
A proverb in my culture says "there is no how a human will walk without moving the head in one way or the other" which is true. You can't be walking and keep your head fixed in one place, you have to move it to look around and in the process of doing this, you might have offended lots of people who thinks you move your head one way to insult them or they don't just like the way you are moving it (sarcasm). My mom once told me when I grew to be an adult and I had to live away from my parents, "you don't have to wrong people before they pick offense at you, all you have to do is try as much as possible to live a peaceful life". This had been my motto for years and it had been helping me lot of times.
The right thing to do when one said or do something wrong is to apologise but there are times one is put off by the act or response of someone you are willing to apologise to for the wrong thing one said or did. There was a scenario that happened during my first year in school. I was well matured before gaining admission into the higher institution so I understand how life works but one thing was to my disadvantage then and that's my stature. I have a small stature that even if care is not taken, if I put on a primary school uniform, it will fits me so well, only my face would tell that I'm far older than the class. So many saw me as a small girl who has the opportunity to gain admission into higher institution immediately after her secondary school. I like it though because I don't have to explain to anyone my age and where I was coming from so I do accept any judgment people made once they are okay with it.
One afternoon in the lecture theatre, my department had quite large number of students which the theatre couldn't have us all in, we had to accommodate one another just to take lectures for two hours. As we all know, everyone of us are coming from different backgrounds, some are rude, arrogant, and saucy while some are respectful, accommodating , and ate advocate of peace. In the struggle to find a comfortable space to sit, I mistakenly stepped on a lady's toes which I was ready to apologise for my wrong deed but her response to that situation pissed me off and I decided not to apologise. I am a vibes giver and that's one thing I love about myself, I give you back the energy you bring.
Immediately that happened, the first sentence she uttered was "are you blind? Can't you see you stepped on my toes? You little spoilt brat that God just favored to gain admission, you will get to school and be misbehaving". At that point, the apology I was ready to tendered flew off my head, I was boiling with anger but I decided to let it slide because the lecturer was already in the class. I hissed and moved on to search for a sit, I told my friend about the scenario and she was more angrier than I was. After the class, I walked up to the girl not to fight but just to put her in her place. " Big aunty, I was the one who stepped on you earlier" I said to her. "You are very rude, you stepped on me and you find it difficult to apologise" she immediately snapped back, she was ready for a fight.
My friend we couldn't take it anymore decide to chip in but I told her to just let it go, because if she interfere , it will be another issue and I don't want to raise any eyelids to myself in my first year at school. I smiled and replied her "I intentionally didn't apologise and I won't because you are so rude, everything you said earlier have a befitting replies but I won't reply you because I am way more than all you said". She was giving facial expressions to show how angry she was but I wasn't paying attention to her face because I'm less concerned at that point. "Watch your mouth and don't get yourself in trouble all because you are big, next time we cross my path , I would apologize if you choose your words wisely but for this , I won't" , I said to her and leave the scene. Since then she was always careful enough for us not to cross paths which is better.
Choosing one's words wisely can save lots of stress and bring peace than one can imagine. If she had be patient enough for me to apologise that day, it would have been easy to reconcile and probably bond but because of her arrogance, she lost the apology and she was the one feeling the pains on the toes not me.
Thanks for your time and your comments will be appreciated.