I am completely fed up with how normalized is in any society the habit (toxic, to tell the truth) of complaining just because? Are you doing badly? You complain, something happens to you, obviously, you complain? You make a mistake, and you are the one to blame? Come on, you keep complaining... Oh, but solve the problems that are caused by the way you act? No, no, no, no. That's not... It is better to make habitual the reiterative act of constant complaining about life situations. Context: Is this a catharsis? Partly yes, partly no....
Wherever I move, I find the same pattern. I understand that people often employ complaining as a social method of coping with the pressures and burdens of responsibility that we all have, especially in adulthood. However, what I have noticed the most, at least where I live, in my region (Venezuela) is that instead of analyzing well the circumstances that cause those existential and material conflicts, the first thing that is done is to end up in victimization.
To put it in simpler words, from my perspective, what differentiates a functional adult from a less mature growth stage is precisely the problem-solving ability that humans possess. To give an example, I will tell a couple of more recent anecdotes. A close friend of mine, all she talks about is how "bad all men are". In her view, "none of them are worthy" of being her partner. So, with such a categorical bias, I ask, is there a solution in sight or is it just a radical expression?
Sometimes, no matter how much I offer advice and alternatives to see panoramas with a little more perspective, I notice that it is not enough.... Quite simply, the simplest explanation is often the most accurate. I believe that in my society, in Latin America, blaming others for the things that happen to us is very common.... For many reasons, we have become accustomed to transferring discomfort to third parties on a daily basis...
And in fact, from a behavioral standpoint, it is not unusual or strange to see that it is also an effective way to break the ice and strike up a conversation with strangers. Yes, it is... Many times there are issues that make everyday life more, or less, bearable. Those who have heard news from Venezuela will know what I am talking about, but I am not referring to the situation in my country but to the lack of mental clarity and reasoning that clouds the ability to find solutions.
Personally, I sometimes consider that I am shielded against this toxicity, but I fail.... That is to say, the accumulation of negativity and victimhood is so great that I tend to get frustrated. Even as a woman, I often have problems of adaptation for not normalizing what I am describing here. Apparently, if I don't complain, I am apparently too "cold" or "indifferent". Just imagine... If the weather is beautiful, it is too beautiful, if it rains, because it rains too much? With that precedent it is impossible to find mental clarity, peace and effectiveness.
In addition, and with this I end, psychologically it is overwhelming. Because the power of catharsis and analgesia offered by expressing a complaint in time, loses meaning when it becomes a toxic habit ... When suddenly, someone shields himself in it and feels that he should do nothing to improve his given situation; or worse, when he pretends that you, who do not share that vision of life, fit in because you do, without contemplation... So, being a little more sensible would not hurt. We are bright, intelligent, capable, we can come up with solutions.
