I will be the first to admit I drink alcohol, and I have done it irregularly since I was like 15 years old. I had stretches with more, stretches with less. But growing up in Germany you do come into contact with it - early and a lot.
But ultimately I'd like to think I got a pretty good grip on the situation overall. I can go weeks without any, and I ever really get thirsty and greedy for it after having a first beer on a day too early.
Something is kicking off then, like a vortex of beer energy that somehow infuses the body with the need for more. Beer is the worst when it comes to the craving. Not a pleasant feeling. And I noticed, and don't like it. A little bit of alcohol too early is always a terrible idea. But if I don't feed it the craving goes away rather quickly.
Well today we ran out of internet, and there is a hack to this travel sim card we use in Albania - if you install and sign up for their stupid app you get 10gb for free. Which is great, especially since you can use it again and again with any new sim card.
So I needed internet wifi connection to make that happen. And not far from the place my lady and I park our van right now, there is a restaurant/bar we have gone to in the past.
So with a largely healed but still fragile-skin foot I opted to hobble over there today to go online and claim my 10 gb free internet, giving my woman some time to relax by herself in the quiet nature on a rather rainy and gloomy day.
Came into the bar and instantly saw sitting there one of the friendly positive shepherds we have come to know in this area. He was stunned when I called out his name and smiled at him, then realized I had two hoodies on that would make recognition harder for him. I took them off and he recognized me instantly. "Ahhh MARIO!!!!" (not my name, but close enough).
And we ended up sitting for two hours, having albanian breakfast together and drinking more rakia than people in the West would deem fitting for pre-lunch time. I mean I feel I have a decent handle on my alcohol intake, growing up in Germany you eventually learn your alcohol limits and preferences to the T. I had fun! And so did he. It's just difficult to communicate when you basically just understand 10 words of someone's language, and for that: it went remarkably well.
Hands and feet most of the time, a lot of energetics, and the lingering feeling that the shared shamanic substance in question (alcohol) helps build the bridges between us two.
Other guests started listening in on our weird conversation and some greek dude walked up to me asking in broken english whether I was looking for a house and how much I had to spend. He had been paying close attention!
Always good to let the external know what you are looking for, I thought. I answered him but nothing really came out of it.
The waiter came again to refill the rakia and I felt: well, this would be my last one. My shepherd friend joined me, and I started wondering how well he could take it. But who am I a dude from Germany telling this Albanian shepherd not to drink his local culture heritage drink?
We ended up enjoying the Albanian breakfast platter and then slowly leaving. I felt energy quickly dissipating and I wanted to go back to the van now that I had successfully reinstated internet on our phone through the wifi connection in the restaurant. I had accepted the invitation to overstretch our breakfast way too long and I felt I really needed to call it a day for now.
Something shifted and I noticed, but only subtly. He came walking with me and I was feeling a bit weird, knowing that my woman could use a break from people and conversation right now. That's the reason I went to the restaurant by myself, so she could be by herself.
But thinking he was merely going the same direction we walked until we actually got to the van... and he stuck around. At times swaying on his legs (making me think woah dude, you had too much for your limit). And he wouldn't leave, not aware enough to feel the energetic repelling force telling him: Dude, we love you, now please just get the fuck away from us, thank you!
But thankfully, I also know he has a good heart and I have become a master of patience, felt it again all through all our conversation.
It's just that spirits (as they are aptly called in english) - hard liquor - opens weird gateways.
When he spoke to my woman from outside the van I felt he was no longer merely the shepherd I knew but somehow "added on to". Like there was an odd unnatural tendency to him that had never been present before. Sort of a lingering need, an audacious pressing towards something, a spirit taking hold of human beings to be able to move around at all on Earth... or something spooky like that... and he just did not get the message that this would be it for today. He wasn't himself anymore.
Well those maybe 20 minutes from our leaving the bar to him finally leaving our temporary home area stretched out to 'forever' in how it felt. But I can't shake the impression that drinking liquor makes you a cosmic target of sorts. Like accidentally opening doors to weird and unknown densities where all sorts of pesky beings can get a hold of you and dig in deeper. With ease. He was still present but a part of him had been overshadowed by something else.
I think it's in the spirit we drank, or rather: in the combination of the spirit we drank and the individual it meets.
I would like to state that I feel fine - after 4 small glasses of homemade liquor. But am I really?
Did the shepherd know anything was different or wrong? Are all people on hard alcohol always possessed and totally out of their own minds? Or do some people just have a propensity to open that door much quicker than others? Have you witnessed people being completely changed when they are drunker than they should be?
Or is it all them, and a mere loss of function on their brains' part?
