Hello, my name is Jay, an artist, a Photography/Videography student, and I am also into Forex and Crypto trading. Over the years, I have navigated life with a bunch of emotions loaded on my back. I react to things that come my way and, in a fight, flight, or freeze situation, I will mostly settle with the flight and console my low self with peace of mind, or maybe I should say peace of space is better.
Unconsciously, I have always picked the side of orderliness in this world of ours, where one needs to find a balance between chaos and order. I have, in most cases, tried to be agreeable without really knowing how that act allows other humans to step on me. I have been in several situations where I expected a certain courtesy to be reciprocated back to me, but got none, and those individuals in question won’t shake their bodies like they need to do a shit. All these patterns that kept occurring to me always mess with my emotions in a wild way. Well, how will I know my emotions were truly tested if I can’t reassess how I felt after a certain event – Did I handle it well or badly, if well – how well did I handle it? Bro I was just in that damn pattern for years.
In 2019/2020, I started getting to learn things about Forex and Cryptocurrency, and then I slowly set foot into the trading world. Little did I know that my trading was mirroring my life patterns back to me. It was showing me my loopholes, but then again – how will I know if I traded well or badly if I don’t pause to journal how my trade went – and use that to assess if I traded badly or well – if bad, how bad? Did I still repeat my previous mistakes?
Just a beginner's story of every trader, multiple accounts blown, your emotions being messed with so badly that your whole day will turn sour once you get a liquidation message, which will humbly lay you on your bed and inject fever inside you. You are lying down, but you will never sleep. You will think sleeping will be the therapy, but that’s the worst emotional choice piece you should pick.
In May 2025, I bought my first Prop firm challenge account of almost $100, I breached the daily drawdown rule within trading that account for just a week+. That shit got to me in a way I won’t lie, I laid on my bed that night and slept off. Morning came, I opened my laptop, and bought another prop challenge for the same amount. I got over that stuff so quickly, unlike how dead I used to feel when I blow up a $20 - $85 trading account, and it is all because I identified my mistakes. As someone that have been using MT4, I didn’t take out time to research more about the new trading platform the prop firm was offering me to trade with, which is Match-Trader. I took a few more minutes out and finished my research on the platform, and so far, the second prop challenge account I bought in May is still rolling till this July, though I am down by 3.76%.
My trading journey took a great turn when I started paying attention to trading psychology and money management, and less and less to emotions. Back then, I was all about the technical analysis aspect mixed with biased emotions. I approached life the same way and kept wondering or if I should even say, I overlooked how I was treated by life.
With trading, just as in life, psychology stays at the front. Emotions should never take that front-row seat. I will even say you should not keep those emotions at the back, but we are humans, I will learn to stay humane in where courtesy is required even if it doesn’t favor me – I just hope I am right with this thinking and not another log of emotions that’s trying to have its way.
Another thing that’s helping me to get a clearer picture of life is this movie “PEAKY BLINDERS”. Bro that movie is it.
Psychology was what always helped Tommy stay calm even in moments of chaos, and strike when the time is right. This is just applicable to trading, no room for FOMO trades, stick to your strategy. Psychology was what made him get back in business with Alfie Solomon even when Alfie have done some betrayal in the past – still applicable to trading, not having love or grudge against any currency pair even if you have had bad experiences with them but you should immediately get onboard with that pair as soon as your strategy aligns well with its volatility. I hope I am making sense, and you all are getting me here? Psychology, too, was what made him move strategically alongside Mosley even when he knew it was risky, but he took some Ls and was always waiting for the right time to strike. In fact, the movie ended with Tommy taking an L, but he got over it, and he never executed Mosley. He (Tommy) was waiting for the right time for that.
We all know trading is risky but to get the reward that comes with it, we should bag some knowledge about trading and move strategically with it rather than give excuses and turn to some low risk assets with little or no knowledge about them, and then eventually, the assets will slowly and steadily eat our invested money away.
Just like in the Peaky Blinders movie, Tommy Shelby was soft and emotional before he went to France to fight for his country as a soldier. He came back and started navigating through life strategically with his emotions well-pocketed.
I will conclude this piece by saying that I am in my France now and I am so looking forward to navigating through life more strategically than ever before while pocketing my fucked ass emotions in a composed manner.
Thank You Dear Reader.