My library co-worker Miss A. had tales of homestead woe today. Her pigs have turned their pen into a horrifying cesspool of manure and old straw all winter, and it was time for Serious Spring Cleaning. Her son and her husband helped her starting at sunup, and continued after she left to join me at work.
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Of course, we tend to think of pigs looking like these cute porkers pictured here, but their droppings are perhaps the most foul on a farm, even more foul than those left by fowl. Not only did her woe inspire bad puns, it also inspired me to write a song parody. Serenade your favorite farmer to the tune of Heigh Ho using these lyrics instead!
We dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig,
in a sty the whole day through,
We dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig,
it's such a pile of poo!
We dig up pig turds by the score,
A thousand pounds or maybe more,
And we don't know what we dig it for,
We dig, dig piggy-pig poo!
You probably won't be murdered gruesomely and fed to the swine to hide your corpse...
I do hope her pigs get better, though. She said they have been a bit sickly of late. I just look forward to when they are fully cured. Yes, I am a bit of a ham myself. Stop looking at me that way.
