For a long time my cell phone ringtone was this song (at the time I didn't leave it on silent).
Please! Play it so you can listen to it while you're reading my post!
With the comings and goings of this life. With the good and bad times, with the emotions that it brings. At some point I got lost, I just got off the hook and didn't see myself anymore as that person who lived quietly until his 25/26 years old around.
My games, no longer had the same effect. The series no longer held me back like they used to. And that wasn't recent. Ever since I started writing there Steemit in 2018, I've lived it. The truth is that writing for a while was my "refuge", even though I started writing when I was looking for various ways to invest, which ultimately provided me with that. A way for me to distract myself from loneliness.
My biggest problem became when my mind got "vague". When I don't have plans for a weekend, or a break, or holidays. If I don't take care of myself, she becomes cruel and knocks me down and makes you fall into the feeling of "Loneliness". That feeling that I never had a problem with and always skirt around laughing, now it haunted me.
That's why I had to create a new routine in my life so that I wouldn't fall into the mind's traps until it was healed again. Because it took me a while to realize and I had to go almost to the bottom of my sanity to understand that when I didn't have anything to really "occupy" with, my mind could be very dangerous with random thoughts and feelings and memories from a past. not so far away.
It wasn't easy and I can't confirm today that I'm totally “cured” or free from these kinds of feelings and thoughts.
But the pandemic brought me something that evolved a lot. The ability for me to face loneliness in a way I've never seen before. Since I needed to stay home and the main things that kept me distracted were traveling or working on something, it was kind of complicated in quarantines. The first few weeks were cruel and difficult, but at a certain point I became aware and learned to enjoy my own company and see who is really important to us.
Today after more than a year I work only at home. I don't need to worry so much about occupying my mind with things. I can now calmly watch again, play (not as much as I'd like, but that's the problem with the weather itself hahaha) and I haven't suffered with the weekends when I don't have anything scheduled. In fact, I've been taking the opportunity to rest and do nothing... Something that was very complicated.
I got back to enjoying the solitude. But not from the bad loneliness. But the good solitude, the peace, the calm that if we know how to dose it is very good and useful for our minds too 😉
That was my participation in WOTW