In my first post in this series I talked a little about the experience of anxiety in a child's view, in this case, of that child who writes to you! As I explained, many of these symptoms that are misinterpreted by the adults that surround the child in this helpless stage, there is still the fact that the child himself does not know how to digest the experiences that he is often forced to go through with impositions that spoil him more than they improve him. But also, many of these details become indifferent and banal as we grow and gain strength, personalized techniques and efficient strategies gained in the daily struggle. And today I decided to speak specifically about a topic that is still controversial within this universe of anxiety, and also about so many other underestimated pathologies that are practically commonplace in the lives of almost all people. The use of psychiatric drugs.
Photo that I took of an old road on the country side of my city, the impression that it is a huge descent is only being up there, but, as we go down, we see that it is not that scary at all. And maybe it was a lot more work to go up there than to go down.
I, born in 1988, grew up listening (or rather not listening) on these more serious topics, almost as taboos. There was no mention of remedies for anxiety and depression, there was no mention of psychotic outbreaks, melancholy at advanced levels, or anything like that. And by chance, I've heard from several people, and not only from my mother, that: "-Wow, funny that before we didn’t hear about depression, anxiety, panic attacks ". Of course, we didn’t talk about it, not only because it was a very serious taboo, but because we didn’t have such a vast and complex community experience, there was no space to learn about studies, of events around the world towards advances in medicine and I can swear that my great-great-grandfather certainly never even had the opportunity to know who Freud was or any classic figure of Psychology (nor will I comment on the figures of psychiatry why these are cursed until today at the level of in the media nobody knows them, even though, have done MUCH more than Freud). But, because it is a practically non-existent subject, there were no mental problems?
Well, just me, I know about 4 or 5 stories of grandparents and uncles of someone who committed suicide. Who has not had in the family or knows someone who has a relative who has "gone crazy"? But of course, one factor we cannot deny. We are living in literally chaotic times, the concept of liquid modernity proposed by Bauman has extremely severe effects on our minds that we are still far from conceiving. Hyper-connection and hyper-information are making us stressed, anxious, with a level of shallow and weak attention and since the 90's until now this massive wave of ADHD diagnoses, anxiety attacks and panic syndrome has been observed. But again, it is worth remembering, it is not just because we are growing as a society, but because we are able to study the subject much more and with much more openness than in the past.
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I already realized that this issue will need to be divided, because it is as extensive as the anxiety journey itself. So, to finish this first part I’ll just tell you how I did, I finally accepted this foreign aid, I faced possible fears,
usually based on public opinion and common sense that taking head medications would turn me into a lethargic, retarded zombie. And honestly, that was more difficult than it seems, because, not only did I have this vision that society has, as I still had an immense criticism about traditional medicine reinforced by years and years of a naturalistic and "good vibes" lifestyle that considered that following the protocol of nature, everything we need, it gives us and that all medication and improved health can be found through it, in medicinal plants. No accident, I actually used some herbal medicines in this way for several years without even considering that in fact it already made me be in that filter of "medicated people". However, over the years, and with my growth out of this self-centered zone of new superiority, the era of good natural energies, I ended up studying countless themes, with several different angles and perceptions, including psychology itself and more and more, studying myself, I ended up better understanding my functioning (often not so normal).
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But the real change in attitude and the desire to find a solution only finally came when I realized that all the tools I had in hand no longer worked, and in the face of a severe crisis phase in the marriage, with a young daughter and a total disagreement with my "former wife "I decided to appeal to something that would be the opposite extreme of what I always believed and preached. After all, it was the last shot, my last attempt before everything collapsed. And then, I swallowed my pride and realized that maybe that state of mine (there 28 years old) of constant depression and melancholy, a bitter and gray view of life, lack of expectations and hopes, where I was just following and even in the phases of good humor I barely expressed a reaction, and in the phrase of my own ex: -I'm tired of being the happy person of this relationship. And you see, in these symptoms I didn’t even talk about anxiety, because this was constant and almost natural for me, being in a perpetual state of "something serious is going to happen" was common to me. And that was certainly one of the biggest factors in triggering all the others I have described. So, there I went to make an appointment with a psychiatrist.
A habit that I realized would become as important as a six-month visit to the dentist or any other care for our health that we are not negligent just like we do with our brain.
I hope this reading was pleasant, probably next week I will publish the next episode of this adventure towards the unknown of human anguish LOL
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