It all started in the year 2011, on a beautiful sunday morning i saw these two unfamiliar girls walking to and fro my street and i thought they were lost but only to see them enter the gate in front of my house minutes later, it was then it dawned on me we have a new neighbour!
Flash back to years before the sudden appearance of my neighbor
During my teenage, i was never an introvert, i was an extrovert that doesn't like to stay at home at all, it is either you see me in my friends house or i am on the field playing ball or in the game centre playing games, sometimes we go to parties uninvited as there is always free food to eat ... Life was so much fun, i had no worries, no burden and i don't even know what love is nor heartbreak even though i had a crush on my classmate in school but it was just a crush, nothing so serious until the new neighbor packed into the house in front of mine...
My neighour
They were a family of seven, two boys and three girls... The two boys were the eldest and the three girls took the last three positions, the second born[male] became my best friend as we were age mate and the third born[girl] was the one i fell in love with!, so what actually happened?
As fate would have it, i became friends with all of the children in that family, i used to go out with their brother to play ball and games and i also do play with the sisters, i showed them my city, i loved the friendship with the family, i was more closer with the second son and then the third born and their last born and it got to an extent when i had to choose between spending more time with the girls or go out with my guys to do what we are used to!
Guess what?
The girls won! anytime i go out to the field or game centre, she always sent her younger sister to lie to me that my daddy is calling me which i know was a lie because my daddy will never send for me when i go out, if that was the case, it would be my mom, so i told her to go back home and tell him he didn't see me, she never listen, she will stay there with me, bug me till i eventually followed her lol, and anytime we are together and i told them i want to go and play ball, that is when they will seize my foot wear and stop me from going, so instead of going to field to play ball, i started playing ball with them, i later accepted my fate, i started spending more and more time with them and it got to a time, i started losing interest in other stuffs.... I prefer spending my whole day with them and they enjoy my company too, we stay together till late in the night because their parent do return from work so late in the night....
There are days the two girls were hungry and their parent with the last girl was taking too long to return, i would give them my night food to eat, i feel happy that i could help them, i go to bed without food happily because i made them happy, oh well i should have known something was wrong but as a teenager who never know what love is, i didn''t know i was already falling gradually in love with her or i have fall finish.. The friendship continues until few months after that i finished my waec and wanted to visit my cousin in another state which she said i must not go, but i didn't listen to her, i left!
When i got to my cousin place, i felt so comfortable with the family and their extravagant life style that i did not remember my friends at home, but two weeks after, i wanted to sleep in the night when something struck my heart like lightening and i remembered the girl, i started feeling uncomfortable after that and two days later i had to tell my cousin i want to return home and she was confused, she asked if i dont like staying with them because i was supposed to spend one month but i told her i have never been to a place as great as their own but i miss home and need to leave, i left 2 days after and when i got home, the girl which was the reason why i left that comfortable life i was enjoying was angry with me, she was like why did i come back and i should go back to where i was coming from.. That got me really angry and i left home again the next day but this time i went to stay with my sister and i got a job there, again i didn't remember her again for six month! and that thing that happened the first time happened again, my heart got struck! and again i remembered her, and again i started to feel uncomfortable, as expected i travelled home after 5 days to see her but unfortunately they were not around, they travelled to their village as it was december period....
I spent one week at home waiting for them and just when i was about going back the next day, they arrived that night! dang my plan changed, am going no more! the next day i couldn't go out to see her, i was shy lol, their brother came to see me as he heard the news i am back and he probably told her sisters too, she is always walking to and fro outside their gate hoping to see me and i was always peeping through our window to see her but i couldn't go out lol...
Well eventually after three days, i decided to man up, i came out and sat at our favorite place which was a soakaway in front of my house, few minutes later she opened their gate and was looking at me from afar, i smiled and called her name, she smiled back and walked towards me, we shaked and i felt electricity ran through my body, dang i am truly in love with this girl, my first love!
She was not angry this time around, it was obvious she regretted treating me that way the last time and knew that was why i left for so long, she missed me, she missed our friendship just like i missed her too!
The beginning of my problem
Nothing really changed, we connected easily but a problem arise! anytime i see this girl i always want to hug her , i really did not plan to do it, there is some force controlling me to do it which i could not resist and she thought probably i am now a bad boy because during our first six month of friendship, i can count the numbers of time i touched her talk less of hugging but she still try to play along with me but she eventually got angry when i hugged her while she was carrying a bucket of water on her head and end up breaking the bucket due to me hugging her, she left angrily and refused to talk to me afterward..
I tried begging but she won't listen so 2 days after i decided to leave again but i sent her a touching message the night before the day i was to leave, though she didn't reply my message but it worked! the next day she was outside waiting for me to come out, but i was taking so much time to prepare and by the time i was done, her friends were already around, i came out and she could only eye me without a word, i smiled and left.. She called me that afternoon and said she has forgiven me and i was the cause of the fight well to cut the story short, i decided to shoot my shot that day itself, so i told her i will call her in the night that i have something to say, she said no problem..
I called her in the night and the question that popped up from my mouth was [ do you love me?] she was like what sort of question is that, dang i felt somehow, looks like i have fucked up, i told her i asked because i love her, she said she doesn't love me, arrg another bomb dropped, i told her not to rush to give me answer that i will ask again in three days time, she said ok, after the call i felt bad, like how can i be so stupid to ask her if she love me instead of me declaring my love for her, well i called her after three days, i got the same response and i said fine i will come home and i will agree with whatever her decision may be when we see...
Weeks later, i went home and yea we played as usual and a night before i was to leave home again, we talked and i asked her out the last time and she told me she can't date me, she is not yet ready for relationship, i said when will she be ready? she said maybe four years time, i asked again if she will reconsider, she said no i should just move on, that was the last straw, i was heartbroken, we departed, i left the next morning heartbroken...
Rejection hurt
My heart bleed for 4 years with that last night rejection, when i got to where i was now staying, that night i wanted to eat but as i was about putting the food in my mouth and i lost appetite and tears started flowing, heart break hurt alot, all my head was swelling up, i just want to cry! i lost two people at a time, my friend and my love, that pain turned me to an introvert, i lost connection with the world, i just want to work and be on my own, i stopped making friends and i got used to being alone, loneliness became my best friend and till now i am still used to the lonely life style caused by the one i love...
Love
I blamed myself for a long time, i blamed myself for asking her a lame question but later on, i figured out i was not the problem, the way i asked her out was not the problem, she just doesn't want to date me, She likes me as a friend i suppose, she have her reasons which i don't know till date but i learnt a lot of things..
Never blame yourself if things go wrong, a person that loves you and truly want to be with you won't care about the way you propose or your flaws, they will accept you like that! so it is never your fault if things go wrong!
Guess what? i fell in love again after four years, it was beautiful, the feeling was mutual but then, story for another day! lol
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Just call me Burl.
I am a professional gamer, motivational speaker and a crypto enthusiast
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God exist, i am a living testimony
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