Finally, I get to let this off my chest.
It's been a long time coming.
And I think, nah, I know that I have had to tell some few good lies(still trying to wrap my heard around 'good lie') in the past/of recent times.
But this one, although it's been years now, hasn't left my mind.
It made me feel guilty then but it was necessary.
It was the day my maternal grandma died.
I had the privilege to spend a few weeks(her last days) with her since I had gone to visit my aunt and her family.
My grandma was there too although not in good state of health. She was very sick, laid in the room almost all the time and could barely even remember me.
Two days before she passed, my aunt, her husband and my big cousin had taken(the word is carried) her to the Federal hospital for her appointment. My aunt would return later in the day to pick some essentials and clothing because grandma had had to be admitted and placed on oxygen.
She'd leave immediately after taking a shower and my cousins and I would go around cleaning up the house and the bed and the sheets and everything, waiting for grandma's return.
On the morning of the tragedy, my aunt returned to rest cause my cousin and big brother decided they'd look after grandma in the hospital, so.my aunt should go back home to rest a little.
She had barely spent two hours at home when a vehicle pulled into the fromt of the house, and then another, and another, all almost arriving at same time. I could see them from my room window which overlooked the frontyard. It was her pastor, her husband's cousin and his wife, her bestfriends and an uncle we all respected.
I knew something was wrong immediately. I just knew that mama had journeyed.
Moments after they went into the house, my aunt let out a loud, piercing scream. By this time, my other cousins, the guys, had come into our room. We all stayed silent looking at one another.
The girls cried. I could not. I did not. Even until date.
Just while everyone was beginning to let the weight of what they knew had become our tragedy set in and begin to murmur amongst themselves, my phone rang. It was my mum.
I froze. Without saying a word, I turned the phone screen so everyone could see the name of the caller. I didn't want to but they nudged me to take it.
I cleared my throat and took the call. After the pleasantries, my mum asked after my aunt and I told her she was okay. Then she asked after her mother, my grandma, although the word caught in my throat, I told her that she was fine. When she asked if I could give her the phone, I told her grandma had gone with my uncle and brother to see the doctor.
When I enquired where she was, she said she'd gone to the big market to get goofs for her stall.
Then she added, "as I de here, my body just de do me one kind."
I asked if she wasn't feeling well, but she said she had left the house feeling okay. That it was only minutes before that she started feeling dizzy and like she was running out of breath. She said she wanted to see her mother and she'd travel.down to come see her. I told her okay, and asked her to look for somewhere to sit and maybe rest a while.
We hung up. I told my cousins what she'd said and they said she probably had felt it from there. You see, she was closest to her mother; the first daughter, the splitting image.
And I knew it would be a wrong time to break that news. My mum wouldn't have the heart for it. There's a likelihood that she might breakdown there, she might even lose consciousness. I did not even think it was in my place to.
And you know what, my mother was actually the last person who heard of her mother's death. Everyone else did(everyone of us from: grandma's siblings to ber children to grandchildren to relatives to even villagers....everyone) and they hid it well from her. They had to trick her into some plot that took her travelling to the village and stopping by grandma's sister's place where they were other relatives waiting and there, they broke the news.
And you know what, she lost control of herself. She wept dirty. Don't know if it was true but I learned she lost consciousness or fell to the ground cause her legs lost their strength or something like that. But then, it waa different. There was people to support her. People to console her and hold her as opposed to what the outcome would be if I had broke the news to her while she was yet at the market. I know my mum very well and I know that doing otherwise would have been a terrible mistake. I would make same decision if I was in thar place again.
Of course.
Thanks for gracing this post.
Greetings!