Image by Daniela Dimitrova from Pixabay
Growing up, I was denied the comfort and security of a safe home. Instead, I faced physical and psychological abuse from my father. Despite this, I eventually managed to press on and break away from that toxic cycle. As an adult, I'm still processing how those experiences have shaped me as a person. No matter how challenging our past may be, it ultimately helps to create who we are today. On the other hand, if we are unmindful of our thoughts and feelings, they can act as a magnet for similar life experiences. For instance, if you focus on negative memories such as your father's punishing actions or abusive behavior towards you (particularly if you are female), you are likely to attract similar encounters in future relationships. The law of attraction is at work here - what we think about will be attracted to us. At the same time, the art of parenting has undoubtedly evolved since our parents' time, technology has made its way into homes for better or worse and plays a huge role in modern life. It has its benefits but also its drawbacks and we must learn how to use it for positive purposes. For instance, when I have no other options left with my son regarding his education or entertainment outdoors due to bad weather conditions or lack of materials, I allow him to use my tablet so he can draw on it or learn letters, and words using Montessori educational apps.
Finding a balance is important without it, your child might become overly dependent on virtual entertainment and you'd be missing out on crucial bonding time with them. During my years in the restaurant business, it was sad to see parents letting their children sit alone or in groups at the next table, their faces stuck in phones or tablets. I observed that this usually occurs when women are the parents — and I find this appalling, considering they are supposed to be the masters of nurturing. I'm sure there could be different reasons behind this - if a woman's own parents weren't involved in her upbringing she might feel too overwhelmed by parental duties now and not have enough support from others. Whatever the case may be, parenting involves more than just saying "well done" to your kid — you need to help them with homework, participate in school activities, volunteer, etc. It goes without saying that every family is different but it's important to realize that how we raise our children will ultimately affect how they behave toward us when we're older and toward other people. And this can be done through something as simple as giving our attention when they show us drawings instead of being preoccupied with social media or TV shows.
By engaging in the process of creating a life, you are preparing your child to face the world with high self-esteem, perform well in school, and develop healthy social interactions. After realizing I was too preoccupied with my career, I noticed a remarkable shift in my son. It seemed that he couldn't stay silent. Whenever we spoke on video chat, even from miles away, he would fill me up on all that took place throughout his day - from kindergarten activities to his thoughts. His teachers have pointed out how sociable he has become and I can’t help but feel proud. Indeed, it is often the smallest things that truly contribute most to successful parenting such as allowing your child to speak without interruption and having respect for his or her opinions. By treating your child with positivity and support, you will surely raise a confident individual surrounded by positive energy.
Let our children not grow up in a terrible world. Together we can make it better. It is our destiny to
suffer from the past, to long for the future, but to forget the present.
Any unsourced images and writing are my own. Life is worth it!
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