Nothing is as difficult as making decisions. I can not count the number of times I swore that I was going to do certain things, wrote them down, and even pinned them on the wall in my room but after a little while, I threw it all away.
But things ought not to be so, if there is anything we ought to take seriously like our lives depends on it is our decisions because they are what will determine what our lives will be subsequently.
Every individual you see today, what they have become, and their success or failure is a vivid result of their decisions some time ago.
Making a decision varies from person to person, depending on one's level of maturity and knowledge.
It takes some people a longer time to decide while some, it takes only a short period of time. However, for me, I don't think it's even about how long it takes but how committed we are to it.
I used to be someone who makes decisions based on emotions. For instance, if I am in a toxic relationship and I want to let it, if the person suddenly starts making me feel emotional by apologizing or promising to make amends, even if I am not comfortable with it, I'll still consider them.
Sometimes, if I am sad, I tend to make certain unreasonable decisions out of the pain, knowing fully that I won't commit to them. Same thing when i am happy.
I have made many decisions that way and ended up having negative results because for each decision we make, there is a consequence attached.
I have come to understand that to make an effective decision one needs knowledge. Whether we like it or not it is not all the choices we make that will favor us, some will definitely cause us pain but what we do after that experience is what matters.
Since, I realized that I am supposed to take responsibility for each decision I make and every choice i make should be something I must be intentional about, I made amends and a lot has changed in my life.
Do I still make wrong decisions? Certainly, I do, but the feelings I get are totally different now.
At a point in my life I decided that whatever choice I have made, whether good or bad, I must accept the results no matter how terrible or good it is.
My decision making process is quit simple, one thing I first check before taking any decision is the consequences.
Remember, I promised myself that I will take whatever the result is, that means I will have to be careful with each decision I make.
Once I consider the perks and the disadvantages, I go for it after verifying that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
The next thing I do is to take emotion out of the picture. Sometimes, our emotions will pound hard, trying to suggest things that are temporal and controray to the choice we are about to make.
Emotions will make it look as if this thing we are about to do is not right even when we are aware that it's the right thing to do.
But we don't have to listen to it because making genuine and profitable decisions hurts.
If you make any decisions that don't inconvenience you to commit to, or conflict your emotions, I doubt it's the right decision.
Emotions blinds our hearts and infuse confusion into our brains, the best way to see clearly, in times like that is to first of all take every atom of emotion out.
What Next?
After taking decisions, what I do is write them down. My primary reason for this is for a reminder. Sometimes we need to repeated get reminded about the things we choice, there is always a temptation to contravene them when we are away from them.
Whenever I see that note on my table, it helps me to stay on track and even when I go contrary, there is always a guilt that beats me hard and drags me back.
Then finally, I commit to that decision, and I zero my mind on anything else. I make that decision a priority and chase it even if no one else agrees with it.
Whether I fail or I win, it doesn't matter anymore. My concern remains to commit to that decision each day.
This is how I make decision, once I take a decision, that is it, it becomes a do or die matter.
But i won't lie, it is not easy, some times, I don't commit, sometimes I feel like compromising with the temptations around but what keep me going is that my heart is already set to it.