Lost opportunities, lost possibilities, feelings we can never get back. That's part of what it means to be alive. But inside our heads - at least that's where I imagine it - there's a little room where we store those memories. A room like the stacks in this library. And to understand the workings of our hearts we have to keep on making new reference cards. We have to dust things off every once in a while, let in the fresh air, change the water in the flower vases. In other words, you'll live forever in your own private library.
Haruki Murakami
Going through memory lane again, I like to think about the opportunities that I have encountered, both the ones I have lost and the ones I had gained. I like to think about my motives behind every action and the main reason I lost or gained those Opportunities. If not for anything, I feel reflecting on these things prepares me (in a way) for future opportunities.
An opportunity they say might come but one's, and missing them could be very heartbreaking. However, I feel opportunity missed teaches us the hard truth about life through the mistakes we have made. But then it is our choice to either learn from them or continue grieving over the losses encountered.
I once missed an opportunity to study in South Korea due to the course I was offered. Although I was already in school, my dad wanted me to travel and oversee by every means necessary and decided to sell some of the family properties just so I could study there. I was first given hospitality as a course to study but I bluntly refused it because I couldn't even imagine myself studying such. Already I was studying computer engineering, so I told my dad I will prefer to continue with engineering and if I must travel oversee, it will be to study my dream course (Marine Geology). Again I was offered petroleum engineering instead of marine geology and I refused still because I was already doing an engineering course knowing I preferred environmental science courses. My dad was furious with me because he had already sold some properties and I was refusing to travel. I didn't care still until the opportunity was gone. It was at that point I realized I only refused despite all my dad's efforts because I was angry with him for how he was maltreating my mum, forgetting that the major reason he wanted me to study petroleum engineering was so I could take over the family business in future and also because I would be able to help the family business if I was working and schooling. (The family business was facing a financial crisis at that time.) Six months later, we lost the family business, and there and then I blamed myself for not thinking diplomatically, rather I let my emotions get the best of me.
Again I can also remember opportunities I took advantage of that are still paying off to date, one of which was when I had the opportunity to learn graphics design during my IT. We had just lost the family business and things were difficult for the family, I got an offer first to work at the bank, and at the same time an opportunity to learn graphics design, and other digital skills. I knew immediately that If I took the Job, I might lose the skill opportunity for life. Know fully well that my future in a Job is never guaranteed, but the skill I learn will stick with me for life. I decided to go for the latter. My dad was very furious again, just months after giving up an opportunity we were all regretting, I was throwing away another opportunity; " he said." Except this time I was sure I was taking advantage of an opportunity and not losing one as he thought. So I endured every pressure he threw at me during that period. I will usually trek a long distance to and fro just so I could learn, and I learned not just graphic design but also most of the digital skills that I use today because I got the opportunity to meet with a lot of tech gurus who exposed me to the tech world. Today I can say I am a better person going through these memories as both the wrong and right decisions I made has groomed me in many ways.
Thanks for stopping by my blog today, until next time