Since I have gained consciousness of what is right and wrong I have always dreaded making promises. This has nothing to do with me not wanting to keep the promises I make, it has everything to do with the understanding of the fact that life is fickle and that which looks certain today may become impossible tomorrow.
I've come across a lot of people in life who are specialists at convincing and coercing one to do their biddings. They tell lies effortlessly and support it with promises to make it a lot more convincing. As far as I'm concerned, one's integrity is on the line whenever one makes a promise. If that promise is not kept, one's integrity gets battered. Anyway, some people don't give a flying hell about their integrity.
Promises can be made in friendships, in businesses and some other scenarios. From what I've come to understand, most promises are made in a romantic relationship between two lovebirds who have no idea what the future has in store for them. Well, if those promises are kept most relationships will lead to marriage. And talking of marriage, the vows shared on the wedding day are some sort of promises, aren't they? If those promises were that easy to keep 99% of marriages will last till death. We all know that rarely happens nowadays.
So, have I broken a promise recently? I think the question really should be, have I made a promise to anyone recently? And the answer to that is yes. The person? Me, myself and I. Staying true to my nature, I don't make promises to other people - not even my dearest ones. I value my psychological wellbeing a lot. The last thing I would want is to make someone a promise that I somehow fail to keep only to be tormented by it. Failing promises have a way of ruining wonderful relationships bit by bit. One may not even realise he's lost the trust and respect of the other person till it's too late.
So, how about the promises I've made to myself. Have I broken them? The short answer to that is yes, I've broken a couple of promises made to myself. When I was # younger, each broken promise always left me in a dark place for a while. I remember punishing myself for failing to make the cgpa I've promised. I was in a bad state for some months and was basically worthless to myself. It took me a while to finally realize that punishing myself for an unfulfilled promise won't make it fulfilled, nor will it reverse the hands of time. However, dusting myself up and preparing to fulfill the next promise made will exorcise the demons of the lost ones.
Now, I am at peace with myself because I've realised I can't do it all, though that realization has never stopped me from making promises to myself. However, not all wars are meant to be won: we win some, we lose some. For the promises I failed to keep, I learn lessons from them that fortifies me for the next stage of my life. Conclusively, I keep my promises to myself. That way, I've managed to stay clear of avoidable wars.
