Many times, I wish I had the power over his situation, but no, I was helpless. If wishes were horses indeed! I asked God for the gift of children, and He gave them to me. Then, I kept facing one health challenge after another regarding my first child, to the point that I questioned God and at the same time reminded Him of this promise, which says that "the blessings of God make a man rich but add no sorrow"! I understand that feeling helpless is what many people experience at some point in their lives, but as humans, we might encounter a situation where we feel, Oh, this one is bigger than me. God, why me, why this or that? However, the joyful part is getting past that moment, feeling better, and praying not to face a similar situation.
My son and I in one of our hospital trip
That faithful day I received an urgent call from my husband to meet him in the emergency room at the children's hospital was the beginning of my helpless moment! I was at a friend's wedding, winning and dining with all the other invited guests. I was feeling happy when the call came and suddenly changed my mood. I can vividly remember how I pulled out the heel shoes I wore and drove so fast to the hospital, badged in to the emergency unit, and saw my son, whom I left so hearty and healthy at home, lying unconscious on the hospital bed. What went wrong? What happened to my son, what this was, why that, and the doctors and nurses, including my husband, were busy asking me to calm down without providing an answer to my one thousand and one questions. Well, I wouldn't bore you with my challenges so far, as it hasn't been a pleasant journey, but my happiness is that the situation is under control at the moment. It's been five years now since the health challenge began, and this has taken me countless hospital trips and admissions with lots of resources until the doctor in charge of my son's case transferred us to Lagos State Teaching Hospital to see a neurologist for his case.
What could be a more helpless situation than when your doctor, after your diagnosis, declared that the only treatment for your case is a 50/50 kind of treatment? You know, after my first son did an MRI of the brain š§ as instructed by the doctor, he concluded that he would do a brain surgery and went ahead to tell me that his chances of survival were 50/50 as the surgery could lead to bleeding of the brain or infection of the brain, considering the suitable treatment plan for his case. Meaning I might lose my son? God forbid. He went ahead to tell me that I could continue with his routine drugs, but that's just management and not treatment. I was weak and unable to help myself with the two dicy suggestions posed to me by the neurologist.
Many people go through helpless moments from time to time, and the feeling can be triggered by different factors in life. Sometimes we feel overwhelmed by the situation, but having the mindset that you are not alone in that situation can actually be helpful. That moment, I got helpless and lost, but then I didn't want to go through it all by myself, so I reached out to my friends, family, and even a group I knew could support the situation, even if it's through kind words; it could calm me down. This was a step I took, and I didn't regret the decision for once.
Finally, I chose to manage his health through prayers and medications instead of surgery, which the doctor said was 50/50; I couldn't risk it! It's been more than 2 years now since we continued the management kind of treatment, and my son has been doing great.
Hopefully, I won't face such a helpless moment as he continues to grow and develop into adulthood.
If you made it to this end, thanks for staying through. I do appreciate your warm visit š¤.
Have a more relaxing weekend.
This post is in response to the #hivelearners community contest on the topic titled Helplessness.
Please note that all pictures are mine.
