I have got three boys as a parent, and I must tell you that children differ in behavior, in character, and in understanding, and that's why using the same method of discipline for every child might not give a desirable result.
Of course parents discipline in order to correct a negative behavior in a child; that's my main purpose of disciplining my children whenever they derail, but then, how many parents actually sit a child down to really make him or her understand vividly why they are being punished and then try making an impact of positive change? See, from my little experience so far as a parent, discipline without making an effort to see changes in the life of a child is void. For parents who always use physical punishment whenever a child does something bad, it's beyond just flogging the child because it will get to a point where the child will get used to being flogged and become aggressive and wouldn't bother changing for good. You see, you haven't achieved the purpose of your discipline with that.
The role of parents in the lives of their children is many, and no matter how you diligently try to nurture these kids and raise responsible children, they will at different points continue to misbehave. This is because they are children and yet to know their left from their right. Whatever comes to their mind, they execute it; it then becomes our job as parents to be there to guide them, correct them, advise them, and discipline them for good because any bad lifestyle left unattended to, they will definitely grow with it.
Personally, I do not romance bad behavior in my home. I am always alert to spot when my kids are misbehaving, and stepping in with different tactics I use to discipline them is not negotiable. I have taken my time to study the character of my three boys, and obviously they are different and they listen to my punishment differently. I was raised up as a child being beaten up whenever I did something bad. Our African parents believe in the rod of correction as the most effective mode of discipline, but most times, I didn't find it funny those days seeing how I was inflicted with pains for just small mistakes. For sure, children get influenced negatively from outside other than what they are being taught at home, and sometimes the kind of thing you will see your child do is just terrible to behold and needs some physical punishment, but I am not in agreement that whatever mistake a child makes must attract physical punishment. It should depend on the severity of such a mistake.
However, the most effective discipline that has been working for me and my boys is deprivation of what they love most and heart-to-heart talk afterwards.
When I talk about heart-to-heart talk, it has become a lifestyle in my home that whenever any of my kids do something wrong and I am not even at home, one of the siblings will remind the person of mom's teachings and the consequences of such actions. I love to know that they are aware of the consequences of their actions, and the fear of striving to stay away from it, is there. Whenever I scold, shout at them, or spank if it's something that needs spanking, I still call them closer later in the day to speak with them in love. Expressing my dissatisfaction over their bad behavior and correcting the action. It's always an emotional session, and I will surely have their promises not to repeat it anymore.
Sometimes I use my mini prison at home, hehehe. I have a room where I lock up anyone that behaves badly, and in there, there will be a factory brain reset, lolz. None of them like being locked up there, and it's just another tactic I deploy in this parenting journey when discipline is deserved!
Overall, every kind of discipline tactic can never work for all children. It's important to find out what works for you and your child, but the most important thing is ensuring to see a changed child after each discipline measure.
This post is in response to the #hivelearners community contest on the topic titled, Parents and Discipline.
Images are mine.