Hello, everyone.
I welcome you to my blog and another wonderful edition of the Hive Learners featured post. We all see forgiving one for their wrong doing as an easy thing to do or something we can just wake up one morning and decide to do it like it is nothing until we are the at the receiving end or the one offended or hurt by the wrong doer's actions and then we get to see that forgiving and forgetting is not as easy as we picture it or make it sound or look. Forgiving is quite difficult for us all as humans especially for those who hold grudges and are very much comfortable with holding grudges and don't see anything wrong with not letting go.
We humans always see forgiveness as one very easy thing until we are the ones expected to forgive a person for the pain and hurt they have caused us. Each and everyone one of us preach forgive and forget and sing it like a song but the moment it is expected of us to forgive and forget, we can no longer preach or sing that song anymore or even practice what was said in the song or what we preached about. No matter how small you feel crime commited us, don't think forgiving that crime is easy.
My cousin made boasting about his girlfriend a habit, he keeps saying how she's faithful and and all of that and sometimes I just look at him and I smile because the truth about this life is that those we boast too much are the ones that will end up disappointing us and when they finally disappoint us it cuts deep and things like this are exactly what we find very difficult to forgive not will we ever forget what they did to us.
Last month he found out she was seeing someone else and it took lots and lots of begging and engaging him in different activities to get him to calm down, funny how his girlfriend's friend that came to beg and please with him to take her back made it sound like what her friend did was very easy to forgive and in her words "she only cheated once, please forgive her", now my question is does cheating once stop cheating on him from cutting deep? Does cheating once stops it from being considered as cheating? Does cheating once makes it easy to forgive? Does cheating once make it easy to forget what she did?
We always tend to downplay the wrong deeds of people towards other when we are not the ones at the receiving end, we try to make it look like forgiving the person for the wrong they did is something one should find very easy to forgive and move on like nothing happened. As for me I see forgiveness as just letting go of the negativity and not letting it hold you back or burden you, you forgive not because it is easy to do so but you do it for you because you want to be free.
As for forgetting that one is impossible, you cannot forget the wrongs people did to you unless you have amnesia or you suffer from a memory loss aside that every wrong deed still crosses your mind from time to time, so yes forgiving can exist without forgetting as we can let go of the negativity without forgetting what actually caused the negativity.